


The Fallout

by The_Utterly_Clumsy_Ninja



Series: In Disguise side stories [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Anal Sex, Break Up, Broken Promises, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, First Time, Forgiveness, Gen, I like to put those in, Lack of Communication, Long-Term Relationship(s), Loss of Virginity, M/M, Moving On, Multi, My precious youth baby and my sand child have a fight, Relationship Problems, Sunshine child helps them, True Love, naruto meddling into things again, safe sexual practices
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-07
Packaged: 2018-05-18 16:59:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 37,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5936065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Utterly_Clumsy_Ninja/pseuds/The_Utterly_Clumsy_Ninja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lee loves Gaara, he's certain of that. Despite the distance that they must endure while Gaara prepares to take over the company his father abandoned, Lee wants to make things work. <br/>But with distance, comes strain and when Gaara refuses to be honest, Lee is left in the cold. </p>
<p>Gaara loves Lee, but admitting it to himself is harder than anything he's ever done. When the company shareholders and board of directors meddle into his private affairs and staying with Lee becomes a battle to keep things secret. Gaara tries to hide the truth from Lee to protect him. But when the truth comes out, it spells the end of what they once shared. </p>
<p>or does it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Do I

**Author's Note:**

> Hey,   
> Been working on this for a couple months now and finally decided to post what I have!  
> let me know what y'all think and just warn you that there are spoilers for In Disguise so read at own risk!

The dry air of Suna blew against Lee’s face as he pulled his car into the apartment complex. The apartment was huge but Lee wasn’t surprised since it was provided with funds from the company Gaara had inherited from his father. Lee happily sprinted from the car, grabbing his small suitcase from the trunk before he headed to the door.

His heart was fluttering with excitement and anticipation as he walked into the front door and to the front desk. The ceiling was high, a glass chandelier in the lobby that had Lee looking up and turning his head to see the whole thing.

The man at the desk looked at him with a raised brow as Lee approached the desk. He smiled brightly at the man.

“Hello, I am Rock Lee Maito-Hatake and can I have the room number for the No Subaku siblings?” Lee asked brightly. The man blinked at him for a moment, giving Lee and his green track pants the once over before reaching for the phone. He dialed a few numbers while Lee continued to admire the architecture.

“Yes, Ms. No Subaku there is a very…green young man here…He says his name is…Yes, his name is Rock Lee, should I…yes ma’am right away.” The young man said before hanging up the phone. He looked up at Lee with a strained smile.

“You can go right up Mr. Maito-Hatake. It’s the penthouse suite.” The man said, pointing towards the elevator. Lee nodded and lifted his suitcase easily and headed for the elevator.

When he got out of the elevator, he wasn’t surprised by the large white door. He adjusted his grip on his suitcase to knock on the door. He barely knocked once before he was being pulled inside the penthouse by Temari. The blond girl smiled as she pulled Lee inside, Kankuro waved from the bar counter near the door where he was tinkering with a small motor.  

“You’re here, good,” Temari said, bringing Lee inside. “Gaara is on his way now from the meeting he had to go to. So far he doesn’t suspect a thing.” Lee smiled, taking a moment to turn to Gaara’s siblings.

They looked well, getting some color from the desert sun. Temari carried herself with her usual confidence and Kankuro had bulked up slightly but still had the same smirking grin he always had. Lee had missed them almost as much as he had missed Gaara.

“Kankuro, Temari it is wonderful to see you!” Lee said happily as he drew Temari into a hug. The apartment was already decorated with a happy birthday banner, streamers, and balloons of varying colors. A cake in the middle of the table.

Kankuro walked up to them, letting Lee hug him as he gently patted the tall man’s back. The other man chuckled.

“Missed you too Lee, now let me get your stuff.” Kankuro said as he took the suitcase. Temari led the man to the living room. Lee was practically bouncing as he looked around the white apartment. It was his first time here and Lee felt his heart flutter again.

“Gaara just texted and will be here any minute.” Temari explained, her smile bright as she pulled Lee into the hall. She reached up and straightened the black locks on Lee’s head.

“You can come out of the hall after we surprise him and tell him we have a present for him.” Temari explained as she stepped away to head back towards the living room. She turned over her shoulder briefly to grin at Lee. He gave her a thumbs up as the whole apartment went dark for a moment. Lee sat in the dark, trying to contain his giddiness.

He had missed Gaara so much and even talking well into the night, texting and emails; it was hard not being able to see his boyfriend. He wanted to hold him close and wake up next to Gaara, to tell Gaara he loved him even though the red head still hadn’t said it back.

He loved his boyfriend and tonight he would get to hold him in his arms for the first time in five months, kiss him and…

Lee’s cheeks flushed as his mind went to other things. He and Gaara had never had sex but Lee was more than ready to take the next step if Gaara was. He wanted to show Gaara how much he loved him by sharing their first time together.

As the lights flickered on, Lee centered his thoughts on seeing Gaara. He listened carefully as he heard Temari and Kankuro yell out their surprise. Then there was silence and Lee’s heart stopped as he heard Temari speak.

“Gaara, who’s this girl?” Temari said and Lee heard the deep voice of his boyfriend answer as he tried not to let the sound send shivers up his spine.

“This is Hakuto Hōki, it’s a long story I don’t want to explain right now. I’m just going to take her home.” Gaara said and Lee heard Kankuro pipe up, his voice sounding nervous.

“Let me take her home, we got you a present and you need to see it now.” Kankuro said as Lee listened carefully for Gaara’s response. He was grateful that Gaara’s brother thought he was important enough for Gaara to see him now. He could practically hear his boyfriend raising his non-existent eyebrow at his brother and he had to hold back a snicker.

“Why can’t I just see whatever it is when I get back?” Gaara questioned slowly. It was then Lee heard a small voice, feminine and shy in a way that reminded Lee of Hinata.

“I’m sure it must be important, Gaara.” The woman said softly. “I can call you later and we can reschedule this date my mother set up.” Lee felt his heart skip a beat, his blood running cold in his body.

Date.

Had Gaara been out on a date with this woman? Jealousy clawed at Lee’s side, fear washing over his senses. He had heard about people in long distance relationships cheating but Gaara would never…

Lee took a deep breath and calmed his shaking body as Gaara said something else. He tried to focus on his boyfriend’s voice. He was just jumping to conclusions.

“After this whole fiasco, it would only be right and I can’t imagine that the gift is as important as Kankuro is letting on.” Gaara tried to argue and Lee decided to make his presence known. He turned the corner, his heart beating out of his chest as he met the teal eyes of his boyfriend.

“Um, hello Gaara.” Lee said with a somewhat nervous smile as he looked over his boyfriend’s lean form. His eyes flicked to the woman by Gaara’s side, a petite and pretty young woman with shoulder length black hair. Lee tried to contain the small voices that whispered of jealousy in his mind.

Gaara’s eyes widened a fraction at the sight of Lee, his mouth hardening to a thin line. He looked Lee up and down for a moment before speaking.

“Lee, why are you here?” Gaara asked bluntly, making Lee’s heart twinge at the callousness of the statement. Lee moved towards Gaara, keeping an eye on Hakuto from the corner of his eye. She wandered towards the photo near the door, not meeting Lee’s eyes for longer than a moment to give him a smile.

“Temari and Kankuro thought you would want to see me for your birthday, so I took some time out of class to come visit you for a week or two.” Lee explained, his smile widening as he rubbed the back of his head.

Gaara looked so handsome in his red dress shirt, black pants and tie. He must have been wearing the black sports jacket that hung on his arm before. His boyfriend was so beautiful, it almost took Lee’s breath away.

“Why would you do that?” Gaara questioned as Lee’s face fell slightly at the question. Why would he come to see Gaara, his boyfriend of almost two years, on his birthday?

“Because I missed you?” Lee stated as if it was the obvious answer. Kankuro looked between the two men as Gaara’s shoulders squared. He glanced towards Temari, who nodded at him.

The pair silently moved passed him, ushering Hakuto away from potted cacti she was admiring that rested on the table near the door.

“I told you before I don’t want you letting your grades slip just to come see me.” Gaara replied, crossing his arms in front of him. “You struggle enough as it is, I don’t need to be the cause of that.” Lee wrinkled his brow but kept up his bright grin, taking a step closer to Gaara. Gaara was just concerned for his academics and not trying to avoid Lee.

“I just wanted to see my boyfriend on his birthday.” Lee said simply, failing to keep the happiness in his voice at bay as the door closed behind Kankuro, Temari and the girl. He wanted to enjoy this time with Gaara, not worry about his own jealousy or fight. Gaara let out a sigh, squeezing the bridge of his nose.

“I would have at least liked some warning first,” Gaara stated with irritation in his voice. “Didn’t any of you think about how busy I am?” Lee bit his lip, hurt filling his heart. Didn’t Gaara want to see him? Wasn’t his boyfriend, at least, a little happy to see him?

Or was he angry that Lee had interrupted his date.

“I thought you would be happy to see me since it’s been so long…I did not mean to inconvenience you…” Lee said, failing to hide the hurt in his voice. “It was not my intention to interrupt your evening.” Gaara sighed heavily, his shoulders sinking as he looked at Lee’s face.

He hadn’t meant to hurt Lee’s feelings. Dealing with rude businessmen, pushy shareholders, and high society people had given Gaara a short temper and a sharp tongue. He needed to be gentler with Lee’s feelings.

“It’s not that Lee, I’m glad you’re here.” Gaara explained, closing the distance between Lee and himself. “I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful, I’m just frustrated and tired.” Lee wrapped strong arms around him and Gaara sighed into Lee’s chest.

He had missed this more than he realized. His heart ached painfully now that he was back in Lee’s arms, his body relaxed for the first time in months. Only Lee could make him feel this safe.

Lee lifted his hand, threading his fingers through soft red locks, pressing his lips to Gaara’s hair and inhaling the familiar scent he loved so much. Tears of happiness pricked at his eyes as he smiled.

“I love you so much, Gaara.” Lee said as Gaara looked up at him. The redhead stiffened under Lee’s embrace and Lee sighed, Gaara still wasn’t ready to say it back to him. Lee tried to push his anxiety away. He smiled down at Gaara, taking his hand.

_“I wonder if Hakuto has heard him say it…”_ Dark voices in his mind whispered but he shook them away. Gaara would never cheat on him. Gaara did love him, he just had difficulty saying it after so many years of abuse at the hands of his father. But Gaara showed it in other ways, like how he still texted Lee every morning to tell him good morning and to say he took his medicine.

Lee knew that he just needed to be patient with Gaara, he would express his feelings when he was ready.  

“I’m sorry Lee, I’ve just had a long day and it’s been very stressful with the company, school and-.” Gaara tried to explain before Lee cupped his face in his bandaged hands, soft lips pressed against his own. Gaara melted into it.

Gaara smiled when Lee pulled away and pressed their foreheads together.

“Why don’t you go take a shower then,” Lee suggested as he ran his fingers through Gaara’s hair. “I’ll clean up in here and we can go lay in bed together.”

Gaara nodded, finding the prospect of a hot shower and a night spent sleeping in Lee’s arms to be a wonderful notion. Gaara headed for the bathroom as Lee turned towards the mess of streamers and balloons. He took a deep breath and started to clean.

After thirty minutes of cleaning and another thirty of trying to figure out how to fit the cake into the fridge. Lee managed to walk into Gaara’s room.

Gaara was already in bed, reading reports in his bed with his reading glasses on. Warmth and affection filled Lee’s heart, aching against his chest as he walked into the room. Gaara didn’t look up but the small smile on his face made the ache in Lee’s heart ease.

Lee peeled off his shirt and pants, leaving himself in his boxers as he collapsed next to Gaara. He took a minute to unravel the bandages he wore around his arms, revealing the scars he covered beneath them. He turned towards Gaara.

Lee propped himself up on his elbow as he watched Gaara for a moment. Gaara was adorable with his glasses on, barely looking up as Lee reached a hand over to lay it over Gaara’s.

The red head finally looked up as Lee’s thumb brushed against his hand. Lee’s round brown eyes were silently begging him to put away the reports. Gaara shook his head and laid the files on his bed ide table as Lee lifted his arm, allowing Gaara space to cuddle into his side.  

“Do you want to talk about what had been bothering you?” Lee suggested as Gaara cuddled into him, pillowing his head against the strong chest he knew so well. Gaara sighed again.

He wasn’t sure he should tell Lee about all the problems he had been facing with inheriting the company and living in Suna.

Despite his name being on the next in line to receive the company, the shareholders kept trying to take advantage of his naivety and further their own agenda’s. He had managed to fish out many of his father’s former supporters but many still remained.

He also had his college degree he was trying to finish, hoping that the business degree would help him in his attempt to control the company. But it was slow going and with everything else he was required to do for the company he was stressed. 

The shareholders of the company had also been throwing women from prestigious families at him for the last three months despite his best efforts. He couldn’t hurt his chances of taking over the company by coming out and telling them he was in a relationship with a man. He couldn’t risk that because then thousands of lower level workers with families and lives could lose their jobs should he fail to take over.

But Gaara knew Lee well enough to know he would be hurt by that. They had fought so hard to be together in high school, had shouldered the hate and show they loved each other despite it all.

The slur that had been branded on Lee’s arm was proof of that.

But they weren’t in high school anymore and things had gotten more complicated. How could he explain to his boyfriend that the whole two weeks they were together now, they wouldn’t be able to go on a date or hold hands in public like they always had?

Gaara shook his head as he cuddled into Lee, inhaling the familiar and comforting scent. He would have to tell Lee eventually but for now, he just wanted to enjoy this closeness with his boyfriend. His boyfriend he hadn’t seen in nearly five months.

Gaara leaned up, gently placing his lips against Lee’s. One of Lee’s long arms encircled Gaara’s waist, the other threading through red locks as Gaara wrapped his arms around Lee’s neck. Lee gently ran his tongue over the seam of Gaara’s mouth and Gaara let him in.

Tongues mingled as Lee pinned Gaara beneath him, one hand wandering up the large green shirt he wore to bed while the other traveled down to cup Gaara’s ass. Gaara gasped as the calloused hand rubbed up the sensitive skin and pulled Lee closer until air became a necessity and they broke the kiss, panting.

Lee smiled widely as Gaara settled against him, hands running down Lee’s chest just to be sure this was real. Gaara didn’t normally dream but to have Lee here and being able to hold the man close was like a dream come true.

“I missed you so much, Gaara,” Lee said as he laid his head in the junction of Gaara’s shoulder and neck with a soft sigh. Gaara tangled his fingers in Lee’s soft black hair as he leaned back on the pillows, trying to calm his body’s reaction to Lee.

“I missed you too Lee.” Gaara said, adjusting his body to better fit along the contours of Lee’s body. Suddenly, his eyes widened when his arousal brushed Lee’s. Lee was hard as well from their passionate kisses, the friction making him moan involuntarily. Gaara’s face flushed as he met Lee’s eyes. Lee turned bright red and mumbled his apologies.

“I’m sorry Lee…I’m just not...” Gaara said apologetically, guilt weighing on his mind. They had been dating for two years and three months. Gaara knew he cared very deeply for Lee and Lee loved him but Gaara was reluctant to say the words aloud, reluctant to give himself completely to Lee.

Love was still something so new and foreign to him. He knew he loved Lee but saying it, admitting it to himself was difficult.

Lee looked up at Gaara, shaking his head as he pressed another softer kiss to Gaara’s lips. His brown eyes shined with understanding and love as he adjusts himself. Lee pulled Gaara against his side as he rested against the pillows, using his free hand to lift the covers over their bodies.

“I know Gaara and I don’t mind waiting for you to be ready.” Lee reassured as Gaara settled his head on Lee’s chest. “Now do you want to hear what has been going on in Konoha? I have so much news.” Gaara nodded, smiling as he listened to Lee’s strong heartbeat.

“Well, Sakura and Hinata both got into a medical program at a Konoha University, Naruto and Kiba both want to do the criminal justice program, Kakashi adopted another dog. Her name is Ūhei and she is a sweet little-mixed breed with white and orange fur. She follows me around the house a lot when I’m there but I think you would like her a lot Gaara…” Lee chatted as Gaara closed his eyes, enjoying the sound of Lee’s voice, his lack of sleep beginning to catch up with him.

Lee wasn’t surprised when Gaara fell asleep. He looked down at his boyfriend, eyes soft as he kissed his boyfriend’s forehead. He reached over towards the lamp and shut out the light, trying not to jostle Gaara’s sleeping form as he laid back down.

He watched Gaara sleep for a moment. He looked peaceful as he slept, all stress finally gone from his face. Lee let out a deep, contented sigh as he felt sleep gnaw at the sides of his consciousness.

“Happy birthday my Gaara.” Lee whispered as he closed his eyes, letting his own tiredness slip over him.

* * *

Gaara rose groggily, blinking as he pulled himself up and looked towards the clock. It was four in the morning according to the bright red letters that flashed at him. It took him a moment to figure out what had awaken him until he spotted his cell phone screen lighting up on his nightstand, vibrating loudly.

Taking the phone, Gaara glanced at Lee’s still sleeping form for a moment before leaving the bed and walking towards the balcony. He shut the door quietly behind him before answering the phone as the screen lite up again.

“Gaara No Subaku speaking, I hope it’s important at this hour.” Gaara snapped, irritated he had to leave the warmth of his bed in favor of the cool air of the balcony. A soft, feminine voice chuckled on the other end.

“Now Mr. No Subaku, is that any way to speak to a lady.” The woman on the other end of the phone said, Gaara narrowed his eyes as he recognized the voice.

Mrs. Hōki, Hakuto’s mother and the wife of the Hōki Tech owner. Gaara had met her a handful of times and he deeply disliked the woman. She was ruthless, political and was always trying to find a way to move higher up in society.

She had tricked Gaara into a date with her daughter earlier that evening under the guise of a business meeting. While Hakuto was much sweeter than her mother, Gaara did not enjoy being tricked to further other’s agendas.

“Mrs. Hōki,” Gaara said coolly, trying to hide his irritation. “With all due respect, why are you calling me at this hour of the day? If this is regarding Hakuto...” Mrs. Hōki chuckled again, making Gaara’s hair stand on end.

“No of course not, my dear boy. Hakuto said you were such a gentlemen to her.” Mrs. Hōki replied, “Although I’m sure your boyfriend sees a very different side to you behind closed doors.” Gaara’s eyes widened, his grip on his phone tightening.

How had she found out about Lee? Gaara shook the thought away, deciding to call the woman’s bluff. He wouldn’t let her intimidate him before he knew the whole story.

“I do not have a…” Gaara started to defend, only to have the voice on the end change.

“I wouldn’t bother lying boy, Hakuto heard the man state that he was such.” Mrs. Hōki snapped, her once gentle voice now aggressive, demanding. “And I just sent a picture to your phone that may interest you.” Gaara pulled his phone away, opening the message he had just received and his whole body froze.

The picture was from his living room earlier that night. Lee held Gaara’s face in his hands, kissing him passionately. This picture had been taken from the inside of his apartment. Gaara saw red as he tore the balcony door open and ran inside towards his living room.

Lee awoke with a start, rubbing his eyes as he watched Gaara run into the living room. The man looked angry and Lee was up like a shot. He quickly pulled on his pants over his boxers, chasing Gaara into the living room.

 Gaara clutched his phone in his hand as he tried to determine where the camera was. He tried to remember where Hakuto had been, judging from the picture angle the camera was near the door.

Kankuro and Temari came out of their rooms, rubbing their eyes and grumbling but Gaara paid them no mind as he locked his gaze to the painting by the door.

Gaara approached the painting and the cacti Hakuto had been admiring when she was there. He ran a hand along the painting with a small growl. Lee walked into the living room, watching Gaara intently.

“Gaara, what is going on?” Lee asked, moving towards Gaara as he dug into the plant pot that housed his favorite cactus. He pulled back a small remote camera and clutched it in his hands. He lifted the phone back to his ear, voice shaking in rage as Temari took the camera from her brother to examine it.

“You bugged my home.” Gaara growled as Lee’s hand rested on his shoulder. “What do you want?” Mrs. Hōki snickered and Gaara ground his teeth in his rage, his fist tightening at his side.

“How about you come over to my home later today and we can discuss what to do with it some tea?” Mrs. Hōki said smoothly. “Let’s say four in the afternoon?” Gaara shook in rage, trying to keep his voice calm.

“And what is to keep me from taking this straight to the police?” Gaara stated calmly. Kankuro looked to Temari worriedly as they waited for Gaara to finish.

“Then the tabloids will have quite a field day when I send the photo to them.” The woman threatened coolly, amusement in her voice. “I can see the headlines now **“No Subaku heir: Hidden Gay lifestyle!”** what will the shareholders think?”

Gaara was visibly shaking now, trying to control his breathing. Lee wrinkled his brows in concern. Gaara met Lee’s eyes, taking note of the worry in them. He took a deep breath, lifting his hand to squeeze Lee’s.

“Fine, I’ll meet with you.” Gaara conceded, his tone icy and calm. Too calm.

“Excellent, I’ll send my driver over at three. Do dress nicely dear.” The woman chirped happily and he didn’t bother to listen to the woman say goodbye before he hung up the phone.

There was a moment of silence while Gaara tried to think. He paced back and forth, trying to gather his thoughts and find a solution. Temari was the first to speak.

“Gaara, who was that?” she questioned, putting a hand on her hip and hardening her gaze as she gestured the camera. Kankuro had turned it off but it was still disconcerting. Gaara turned to his siblings.

“Mrs. Hōki planted that in our apartment with Hakuto’s help, to spy on us.” Gaara explained, pointing towards the camera in his brother’s hands before crossing his arms in front of his chest. “She is going to blackmail me it seems.” Kankuro’s eyes narrowed at his brother as Gaara lifted his phone towards his sister.

They examined the photo together, sighing audibly. Temari reached for her own phone, to call some lawyers in hopes of clearing this up as she walked out of the room. Kankuro sat down on the couch heavily, swearing under his breath.

“What did she find out?” Lee asked, his brow wrinkled as he watched the siblings. Gaara stiffened as Lee caught a glimpse of the photo on the phone. It was of them, kissing earlier that day. Lee was confused for a moment. It was only a picture of them together, until the realization dawned on him.

Gaara had been hiding their relationship while he lived in Suna. Was that why Hakuto and Gaara had been out, so Gaara could pretend he was in a straight relationship while Lee pined for him in Konoha. Jealousy and hurt bloomed in Lee’s chest at the thought, digging into his heart.

“Lee, let me explain for Gaara…” Kankuro suggested, rising to stand in front of the bushy browed man and shield his brother. Gaara rubbed his eyes, still tired and irritated. This was not how he wanted Lee to find out his situation.

“You have not told anyone about us?” Lee said, his eyes not leaving Gaara’s. “Why did you not tell me?” Gaara sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Because I knew you would not understand Lee and it’s a complicated situation…” Gaara explained, hoping he could explain the situation. Lee thought about Hakuto, she had clearly betrayed Gaara’s trust but the thoughts whispered at him.

“No, I understand.” Lee said, hurt very apparent in his voice. “You do not trust me.” Gaara sighed heavily as Kankuro backed away, not wanting to get in the middle of the fight.

“I do trust you Lee, I just didn’t want to hurt you.” Gaara defended, meeting Lee’s eyes steadily. “You’re being irrational.” Lee crossed his arms, tiredness making his irritation sharper. He wasn’t angry that Gaara had hidden their relationship, but that he hadn’t trusted him to understand that.

“I am not being irrational.” Lee said, his voice unintentionally getting louder. “We are in a relationship and part of that is trusting one another, sharing our problems.” Gaara met his eyes with his usual blankness.

“There are some things that I like to keep to myself.” Gaara replied and Lee found his irritation rising to the surface.

“I noticed.” Lee said without thinking, crossing his arms over his chest. Gaara’s eyes narrowed as Kankuro turned to follow where Temari had disappeared to. He was not sticking around for this.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Gaara questioned, raising a non-existent brow. Lee met the teal eyes steadily.

“It seems like you want to keep everything from me lately.” Lee accused, his eyebrows furrowing. “You hide your feelings and refuse to tell me about what is bothering you. You act as if I am a child that needs to me coddled and not your boyfriend!” Gaara stared blankly at his boyfriend, eyes narrowing into a glare.

“Well, you’re certainly acting like one right now.” Gaara stated, turning towards his room. “I am allowed to have things I want to be kept private.” Lee glared at Gaara, anger fanning higher as his thoughts turned to Hakuto and her mention of a date.

“Does that mean going on dates with girls like Hakuto?” Lee demanded, clenching his fists at his sides as Gaara’s eyes widened. The redhead stopped in his tracks and turned back around to face his boyfriend.

“Are you accusing me of cheating on you?” Gaara questioned, his own voice rising in his disbelief. “You know I would never do that Lee!” Lee groaned as he became more frustrated.

“Then tell me why Hakuto called it such?” Lee shouted searching his face for the answer in Gaara’s face. Gaara stiffened and Lee’s shoulders fell as he continued. “I have been asked out on dates but I always say no because I love you and wish to remain loyal to you! You do not need to say you are gay to refuse a date.” Gaara rubbed his temple, temper rising as he met his boyfriends gaze.

“It’s not my fault the shareholders keep throwing girls at me but I have never willingly accepted a date!” Gaara snapped, losing his temper and control of his tongue. “You don’t understand how much of a burden it is to hide…” Lee threw his hands up in frustration.

“I wasn’t aware that our relationship was such a burden!” Lee interrupted and Gaara groaned, too tired and angry to catch the next words that slipped from his mouth.

“Sometimes it is!” Gaara growled before he could stop himself. Silence passed for several moments as the weight of Gaara’s words sunk in. Lee’s eyes widened for a moment, hurt stabbing at his heart before his anger flared over it.

“Well if our relationship is such a burden, maybe we should not be in one!” Lee shouted back as Gaara glared at him.

“Fine.” Gaara replied as Lee moved to grab his suitcase that still rested against the chair in the living room. He grabbed the green suitcase and walked out the door, slamming it behind him and shaking the walls with the force.

Gaara rubbed his face, breathing heavily for a moment as he tried to regain control of his emotions. Then the realization of what had just happened crashed down on him, an icy bucket of fear and despair as his heart froze.

Had Lee just…Had they just…

Suddenly, Gaara couldn’t breathe.

Temari came out of the room after hearing the door slam, followed by Kankuro just as Gaara leaned his back against the front door. He clutched the space over his heart. Temari approached him slowly, looking around the room as she searched for Lee.

“Gaara, where did Lee go?” she asked and Gaara just shook his head as he looked up. Kankuro’s eyes widened at the hurt he saw swimming in his brother’s eyes. Gaara moved slowly, crossing his arms in front of him as if he were cold.

“We broke up, I assume he’s going home to Konoha.” Gaara said simply as he walked towards his room. He needed to be alone. Temari’s eyes widened as she and Kankuro exchanged looks of shock. Lee and Gaara usually got along better than this. How did one little argument result in this?

“Gaara, are you going to be okay?” Kankuro asked, moving towards his little brother. Gaara shrugged as he went into his room, not answering as he shut the door. Kankuro looked towards Temari as the door shut.

“Should we go after Lee?” Kankuro asked, unsure how to help in this situation. Temari shook her head. She wanted to help as much as Kankuro did but this was not something they could fix. Gaara and Lee would probably make up in the morning, they shouldn’t worry too much.

Temari turned to her room, tiredness itching at her eyes.

“Let’s just handle this in the morning, everything will be clearer then.” Temari said as Kankuro followed her down the hall towards his own room. Kankuro spared one more glance towards Gaara’s room.

He just hoped his brother was okay.

Gaara looked around the room, the whole house feeling colder now that Lee had left. He laid his phone on his nightstand and turned to lay down when a he noticed a lump of fabric on the ground.

Lee had left his shirt behind, forgetting it in his angry huff. He leaned over and picked up the soft garment as he crawled onto the bed. Gaara settled onto his soft bed, not wanting to sleep right away.

He pressed his back against the headboard, pulling the shirt into his chest. As he pressed it close to him, seeking some kind of comfort from Lee’s familiar scent and just let his heart throb painfully.

Lee had finally given up on him and Gaara was alone again.

* * *

 

It wasn’t until Lee was out of Suna and two hours from Konoha did he realize exactly what he had done. He managed to keep his tears at bay while he drove, finally reaching his home town. He didn’t even realize he had driven to his father’s home until he pulled into the driveway.

It was there that he finally let the tears fall onto the steering wheel of his car. He cried until his throat was raw and his nose became too stuffy to breathe, the steering wheel soaked in salty tears.

His heart felt as if it had been ripped open, stabbed with a cold knife with every thought of the man he loved and what he had just done. Why had he said that? Why couldn’t he just leave it alone and just trust that Gaara was only trying to protect him.

Part of him wanted to go back to Suna, run back to his boyfriend and beg for his forgiveness. He wanted to forget this whole argument and just make up with Gaara.  

But Gaara hadn’t even moved to stop him, hadn’t tried to fight for what they had. Doubts whispered at his mind but Lee tried to shake them away as he took a deep breath.

Lee finally ran out of tears and reached into his suitcase to fetch a shirt. He had left his other one at Gaara’s. Lee’s heart throbbed painfully at the thought of the red head. He managed to get out of the car and walk up to the door.

He knocked, knowing Gai would be awake now. It was almost seven thirty now and the man would be done with his morning workout and preparing breakfast.  The sound of barking filled the house just moments before the door opened to reveal his father, Kakashi. The silver haired man raised a brow as he moved aside to let Lee inside.

“Lee?” Kakashi said, closing the door as the eight dogs sniffed around Lee’s shoes. “Not that I’m not happy to see you but aren’t you supposed to be in Suna for the next few weeks?” Lee toed off his shoes, not answering just as Gai rolled out of the kitchen in his wheel chair.

The men exchanged a look at the sight of Lee’s slumped shoulders, puffy eyes and sad expression. Neither man made a move to ask Lee what was wrong as he walked towards the living room. There were cracks in the normally strong armor their son wore, Lee seemed so fragile that Kakashi feared one touch and their son would break. Lee would speak when he was ready.

Lee wandered over to the couch, followed by the dogs. He collapsed onto it and several dogs whined as they fought for a spot by Lee’s side, nuzzling into him and settling onto different spots on the couch. Lee laid a soft hand on Ūhei’s head while Bull walked between his legs, laying his large head in Lee’s lap. Pakkun hopped on top of Bull’s head to get closer as Shiba and Bisuke sat next to Bull while Guruko, Urushi and Akino all piled into his lap, trying to get a spot. Lee barely managed to fit them all on him.

“Gaara and I…we got into a fight.” Lee said softly, fresh tears pricking at his eyes. “We broke up…” Kakashi’s eyes widened as he looked towards Gai, his partner already wheeling towards their son.

Bull whined at Lee, letting the man bury his face in his black neck fur as tears began to fall once more. Kakashi felt his heart ache as a painful sob escaped the dark folds of Bull’s neck. Gai managed to maneuver around the dogs and lifted himself onto the couch as Kakashi settled on Lee’s other side.

“Lee, what did you fight about?” Kakashi asked as Lee finally looked up, eyes still watery and face still red as Gai put his arms around Lee’s shoulders.

“Yes, you seemed so excited to see Gaara…” Gai added as Lee sniffed, wiping his nose with his forearm. Bisuke licked his arm, licking over the raised scars on Lee’s left arm. He had forgotten to cover the offending word before he left. Seeing it now made him think of Gaara and fresh tears rolled down his cheeks.

“Gaara has been hiding our relationship while he is in Suna and not telling me. The shareholders at his company keep trying to get him to date some of the heiresses of other companies and when I got there he was coming back from a date with one.” Lee explained sadly. “He has been so distant these past few months but I thought it was because of the distance…” Gai looked over at Kakashi, his eyebrows wrinkled as a silent agreement passed between them. Kakashi rose, walking towards the kitchen.

“I’ll put on some tea, it’ll calm your nerves.” Kakashi stated as Gai pulled Lee close. Lee buried his face in his father’s neck, his voice shaking as he tried to finish.

“I let my jealousy get the best of me and we fought. I suggested that if our relationship was such a burden, then maybe we should not be in one and Gaara just said “Fine.” Then I stormed out...” Lee sobbed, confused and hurt by his boyfriend’s actions. Gai curled his arms tighter around his son.

“I am sure everything will work out,” Gai reassured, rubbing Lee’s back and pressing his lips to the man’s hair. “I’m sure when you’ve both calmed down and everything has blown over, one of you will call and this whole thing will just be a funny memory.”

Lee nodded as Kakashi brought in a cup of tea to Lee. Lee took the warm mug from his father, letting the hot porcelain cup and blew away the steam. He took a sip, just barely scalding his tongue on the hot liquid. It made him feel warm and soothed his frazzled nerves.

“But…he just let me leave…” Lee whispered softly, watching the brown liquid swirl in the cup. “Why did he not stop me…I thought he loved me…” Maybe Gaara did not love him as much as Lee loved Gaara.

Kakashi looked at his son’s exhausted form, reaching for the green turtle printed blanket on the back of the couch before turning to Bull, pointing down the hall.

“Bull, bring pillow.” Kakashi commanded and the large dog disappeared down the hall and into a bedroom. A few moments later the dog reappeared with a pillow held carefully in his jaws. Kakashi took it, patting the dog on the head and setting it on the arms of the couch.

“Why don’t you sleep for a bit Lee, you look dead on your feet.” Kakashi suggested as he propped up the pillow, shooing away the dogs so Lee could lay down. Lee laid his head down, letting Kakashi cover him with the blanket as Gai pull himself back into his wheel chair and wheeled over to Lee’s head.

“Get some rest Lee, everything will be better later.” Gai said, giving Lee a light kiss on the head as the dogs took different places around Lee’s body on the couch. Lee felt his eyes getting heavy, his heart still aching but he had no more tears and no energy left to even attempt to drive to his apartment.

Pakkun wiggled under Lee’s chin, snorting as he settled into Lee’s chest. The others piled onto him as Bull plopped onto the floor next to the couch. Lee felt warm as his eyes fluttered closed as he fell into a stress filled sleep.

                                                          


	2. Close

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been six months since the breakup and Lee still clings to small pieces of the relationship he had with Gaara. after trying to patch things up and getting no reply, he's thrown himself into school and tries desperately to ignore the love he still feels for Gaara. 
> 
> Meanwhile, Gaara struggles with pretending to date Hakuto at the risk of losing all he worked for. He ignores the calls from the one he truly loves, hoping that Lee will move on and be happier.

Lee stared up at the ceiling from his desk, too distracted to focus on his textbook. Classes for summer started tomorrow and he was trying to be prepared for them. His first one would be intro to business class that he was looking forward to. He was only another semester or two away from graduating with his associate’s degree in education but he knew the business class would help him run the dojo more effectively.

Out of habit, Lee looked down at his phone. Only one new message from Tenten, no missed calls and no new voicemails. Lee felt his heart sink a little, pain stabbing at his chest. He glanced at the calendar on his desk.

It had been almost six months since his break up with Gaara. Six months and no answer to any of the messages that he had left the red head. He knew Gaara had heard them because every time he filled the voicemail with message after message, he would call the next day and the voicemail would be empty. The red head was ignoring him it seemed.

Lee opened TenTen’s message, scanning it over as he laid his head on his desk.

**Lee, Neji and I are on our way over. We are taking you out with us and we aren’t taking no for an answer.**

Lee let out a sigh as he stared at the message. Tenten and Neji had been attempting to get him out of the house a lot lately. His room was where he spent all of his time when he wasn’t at the dojo or school. He could tell his fathers’ were worried about him but he didn’t see a problem with that. Everywhere he went in town reminded him of Gaara anyway.

His friends and family worried too much. He was fine, he just needed to study and get his degree. He didn’t have time to worry about dating or anything, he would move on when he was ready.

 He let out a sigh as he heard the front door open and close, footsteps starting to walk down the hallway towards his room. He knew before they knocked on his door who it was.

“Lee, you in your room?” Tenten’s voice asked just as the door to his room swung open. Lee smiled at his friends, pocketing his phone as he rose. Tenten looked nice in her pink Chinese-style dress, boots and fishnet leggings with her hair tied in her buns that faded into braids behind her.

Neji stood there in a nice dress lavender shirt and white pants, scanning Lee’s old sweatpants and stained t-shirt with a small frown.

“Hello my friends,” Lee greeted, his smile strained as Tenten gave him a look before shoving a shopping bag into his chest and turning him towards the bathroom.

“Don’t hello us, get in the bathroom and change into this.” Tenten ordered, “We are taking you out to that new gay bar that just opened and you are going to mingle with other gay guys. We’re meeting Hinata and Sakura there to celebrate their anniversary.” Lee’s eyes widened as he was shoved into the bathroom and the door shut. 

 While Lee was happy to celebrate Sakura and Hinata’s love but he was not happy about being dragged out of his room to a thinly veiled attempt to get him to socialize with other men.

“I cannot go Tenten, I have-.” Lee started to say but Tenten interrupted from behind the door.

“You have read and re-read your text book five times since you got the damn thing,” Tenten said, annoyed by Lee’s attempted excuse. “You can’t just sit in your room pining away.”

Lee sighed, pulling off his shirt and taking out the green dress shirt and black jeans Tenten had gotten him. He sighed as he pulled off his shirt, tossing it towards the hamper

 “Tenten is right Lee,” Neji agreed, using his matter of fact tone that often made Lee feel like he was being scolded. “It’s been six months and **_he_** hasn’t called you or answered your calls, it’s time to move on.”

Neji and Tenten had taken to not mentioning Gaara’s name when talking to him, a gestured Lee was grateful for that. Hearing Gaara’s name still made his heart throb painfully. Lee sighed heavily, catching a look at the scars on his arm as he pulled his pants down.

“Fag”, the word that had been healed for some time now, raised and pink. Lee ran his other hand over it, feeling the raises and jagged lines. He was still very self-conscious of the scars on his arms and was grateful Tenten had taken the care to get him a long sleeved shirt.

As Lee pulled on the dress pants, part of him knew his friends were right. Gaara hadn’t even tried to mend their relationship. Gaara had just let Lee leave without argument. It was clear Lee had been more invested into their relationship than Gaara had been.

But there was still a part of him, a tiny voice inside his head that hoped his boy-

His ex-boyfriend still loved him.

Lee pulled on the shirt, buttoning it up high on his neck and buttoning the cuffs. He let out another sigh as he looked into the mirror at his reflection. The dark circles under his eyes weren’t too drastic but they did show how little he had slept in the last few months. He’d grown used to it and he hoped they would remain hidden under the dim lights of this club.

Lee opened the door and faced his friends, putting on a grin. Tenten looked him over as he walked out. She shook her head and pushed him back into the bathroom as Neji leaned against the door.

“Open up the collar a bit Lee, you look like a prude.” Tenten chastised, undoing the first four buttons quickly and Lee frowned in disapproval. He looked over at Neji, whose collar was properly buttoned.

“But Neji is doing the same thing!” Lee protested, pointing towards Neji. Tenten shook her head and snorted.

“And that just proves my point.” She said as Neji rolled his eyes. Lee’s shoulders slumped as he let his friend do what she wanted. Tenten had always taken it upon herself to make sure the boys dressed nicely.

Tenten reached under the sink, grabbing some gel that Lee never used and grabbed his comb off the counter. Lee looked at her nervously.

“Now let’s fix your hair.” Tenten said as she poured the gel into her hand and rubbed it in before pulling Lee down onto the toilet. “You are too tall, ya know that?” Lee glowered at her, his eyebrows furrowing.

“What is wrong with my hair?” Lee asked as Tenten put the product in his hair. Tenten gave him another look, raising her brow.

“It’s a bowl cut Lee,” she stated as she combed his hair back. “We want you to look cool, not look like Gai-sensei.” Lee bit his lip to stave off his next complaint as Tenten finally pulled away looking satisfied with her work before grabbing Lee off the toilet by his wrist.

“You look great this way, you’ll be beating guys off with a stick.” Tenten said as she pulled him in front of the mirror. Lee did have to admit he did look nice but the nervousness still swirled in his gut, making him feel nauseated.

“I do not think I am ready for this Tenten…” Lee said softly but Tenten shook her head as she grabbed Neji by his wrist and dragging both boys down the hall to the door.

“You are Lee,” she assured him as he pulled on his orange converses, shaking her head at his shoe choice but not correcting it. “You don’t have to pick anyone up, just mingle and have some fun.” Lee sighed in defeat as Neji opened the door and Tenten ushered him out to the car.

He could, at least, try to enjoy himself. It wasn’t as if he needed to talk to anyone but his friends there. Besides, he hadn’t seen his friends in ages and it would be nice to see them.

He could stay for a little while, then come back home to his room.

What could go wrong?

* * *

 

Gaara blinked down at the shirt he held in his hands, poised over the garbage can. He glared at the green shirt and tried to force his hands to just drop it. His fingers refused to budge as he let out a heavy sigh and pulled the shirt away. 

This was the third time this week he had fought with himself over whether or not to throw out the shirt Lee had left behind. It had been six months since the man had ended their relationship and Gaara knew he should just move on.

But he couldn’t bring himself to throw away the infernal garment.

Gaara pulled it to his face, inhaling the lingering scent that still clung to the threads. The musky scent of Lee calmed his nerves and he let out another sigh as his heart beat painfully in his chest. He walked to his room, placing the shirt onto the bed as he turned to his closet.

He needed to get ready, he had a date with Hakuto this evening. 

Mrs. Hōki was still holding the photo over his head, using it as leverage to force him to publically date her daughter and increase her status. Hakuto was sweet and genuinely tried to talk to Gaara about his interests, making him feel somewhat guilty about his half-hearted attempts at this “relationship”.

He took out his deep red trousers and a silk dress shirt. He pulled on the shirt, buttoning the collar and reaching for the red blazer he kept by the door. Gaara looked into the mirror that hung on his closet door and sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to straighten it.

Gaara gave up on taming his hair, he really needed to cut it. Lee usually was the one to remind him to cut his hair. The thought of his ex-boyfriend made Gaara’s heart ache again.

Gaara mentally shook the thoughts away as he walked to his nightstand, picking up his phone and seeing no new messages.

Lee had spent three of the six months since their break up filling his voicemail with message after message, begging Gaara to talk to him and saying he missed him but Gaara had ignored them all and deleted them.

Gaara had been angry and hurt for the first few months. Angry that Lee had left him and hurt that the man claimed to love him but could leave so easily. He wasn’t angry anymore but what use would it be trying to mend what they had once had when right now he was being forced to comply with the demands of Mrs. Hōki, the shareholders and the board of directors.

He hadn’t been able to tell Lee how much he cared before they ended things, he had been unable to give himself completely to Lee. How could he drag the man he…loved back to him only to tell him they couldn’t be together publically because of that infernal woman. Lee deserved someone who could stand by his side and give him as much love as they could, not someone who hid away their relationship as if ashamed of it.

He didn’t love Hakuto, he barely liked her as an acquaintance and pretending to be with her was playing a role in a stage show. Gaara would hold her hand in public and kiss her on the cheek in front of cameras when the reporters gathered around.

All the while, Gaara would be thinking of Lee and wishing it were his rough fingers intertwined with his, that he still had to crane his neck a bit to reach Lee’s lips, that Lee was the one sitting across from him at dinner.

And when he would get home, he would pull on Lee’s old shirt and stay up well into the night doing paperwork. When he did sleep, his bed was cold and empty. There were no phone calls from Lee, wishing him a good night or telling him in an enthusiastic tone how his day went.

He was alone.

Gaara sighed again, pocketing his phone and slipping on his shoes, leaning down to tie them before heading to the front door. He grabbed his keys and locked the door behind him as he began mentally preparing himself for another night of this charade his life had become.

It was going to be a long evening.

* * *

 

The music was loud in the club, bringing all the young twenty something's to the dance floor. Smiles were abound and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves.

Lee watched his friends as they danced, even Neji being dragged out onto the floor by Hinata. Sakura pulled Hinata close, hips swaying as they danced to the music of the slower song. Lee sighed as he nursed his Shirley Temple at the bar.

He was trying to have fun but every man that approached him and asked for a dance was turned down. Tenten glared at him once or twice but continued dancing, she wasn’t going to force him to participate if he didn’t want to.

Lee just couldn’t bring himself to dance, his heart just wasn’t in it. To be truthful, even in all this excitement, he missed Gaara. Every time one of the men had approached him to dance or talk, all Lee could think about was what Gaara would be doing.

Lee smiled. Gaara hated dancing, at least in public. Lee would have had to ask him three or four times before the red head would finally give in and joined him during a slower number. Lee’s heart ached as he thought about what Gaara would be doing with him right now.

Gaara would have kept him from the alcohol, hating what drinks did to Lee. He would have asked to leave early and the pair would walk home, hand in hand to Lee’s home. Gaara always said he liked Lee’s home best.

 _“Your house is…warmer than mine.”_ Gaara had often said whenever Lee brought it up. Lee let out a small sigh. He wanted to go home now.

“What has you smiling so brightly, Hot stuff?” a light voice said drawing Lee from his thoughts. He looked up to see a man with blue hair and brown eyes, he smirked at Lee in a way that made him feel a little uncomfortable.

“Oh, it is nothing.” Lee said over the loud music, smiling as he stirred his drink. The man eyed it and gave a small laugh.

“Want me to buy you a real drink?” the man asked, taking a seat next to Lee. Lee strained to hear the man as the music finally calmed for a bit, switching to a slower song. “My names Datsuji by the way.” Lee shook his head.

“I do not drink.” Lee said as he went back to his drink, trying to be polite but not wanting to speak to the man next to him. He wasn’t exactly comfortable with the way the man was talking to him. Gaara never made him feel this way.

Datsuji gave him a look, raising his eyebrow. His smile faltered for a moment before he raised a hand to Lee’s arm. Lee stiffened as the man ran gentle hands over the muscles beneath his shirt, his smile returning.

“My, you’re well built. Do you work out?” Datsuji cooed, light fingertips running down his arm. Lee shivered involuntarily at the gentle brush across his arm.

“Um, I study martial arts.” Lee said awkwardly, taking a sip from his drink as he tried to get the man to stop touching him. “I have studied for years…” The man didn’t seem to get the hint as his hand wandered down to Lee’s thigh.

“I bet you could teach me a few moves.” Datsuji stated, his hands wandering too close to the area between Lee’s legs and leaned towards his ear. Lee stiffened as Datsuji whispered in his ear, breath hot and making him even more uncomfortable.

“Maybe you’ll let me teach you a few of mine?” the man suggested as he gently ran his hand down Lee’s inner thigh. Lee bolted up from his seat and shook his head, eyeing the exit. He gave the man a nervous smile as he turned.

“Um, no thank you, I am not interested.” Lee stammered as he nodded towards Datsuji. “If you will excuse me.” Lee didn’t look back as he opened the doors to the club, rushing out into the warm night air. He pushed past a few club patrons as he walked down the street.

He pushed his hands into his pockets with a sigh. It had been rude to just run off but Lee did not appreciate being touched like that by a complete stranger. Lee walked down the street. It was only a few blocks away from his home and frankly he needed to clear his head.

The summer night was warm and the air helped Lee’s cluttered thoughts. His feet seemed to carry him on their own, taking him further from the club and towards the safety of his room.

He passed by an electronic store just as his phone vibrated in his pocket. Lee let out another heavy sigh as he took it out. Tenten was calling him, probably wanting to know why he had left. Lee lifted the phone to his ear.

“Lee, where did you go?” Tenten asked, her voice sounding annoyed. Lee tried to sound happy but he was sure Tenten would see through it.

“I had a little bit of trouble at the bar.” Lee stated, deciding on a partial truth to placate his friend. “I decided that it would be best if I went home.” Tenten sighed on the other end of the phone, making the speaker crackle as she did.

“Okay, Lee…but you know you’re eventually going to have to get over him.” Tenten stated as Lee looked off into the distance.

“I do not know Tenten…sometimes it feels like he will call any moment and we will be able to start over…” Lee said as he looked up towards the electronics store, eyes catching the televisions in the window as they flashed some celebrity news show.

There was a flash of red hair on the screen and Lee felt his world slow down, Tenten’s next words drowned out as Lee’s heart skipped a beat.

Gaara was on the televisions in the window, Hakuto on his arm as they walked towards a movie premiere in Suna. Gaara looked handsome in the dark red outfit he had chosen, expression neutral as photographers snapped photos. People gathered around them as Gaara glared at them, the guards kept him and several other important figures safe. A reporter smiled at Gaara, holding a microphone to his mouth.

“So you and Ms. Hōki have been dating for nearly six months now,” The reporter stated, fake smile wide. “Some are saying we may be hearing wedding bells in the future, do you have any comments Mr. No Subaku?”

Gaara blinked and opened his mouth to say something when Hakuto piped up.

“Oh, it’s too early to be thinking about that.” Hakuto stated into the microphone, smile bright. Lee’s throat caught at how pretty the woman looked beautiful standing next to Gaara in a long blue gown. They looked like the perfect couple, more so than Lee and Gaara had looked.

Hakuto whispered something in Gaara’s ear and the red head leaned down to peck her gently on the lips before they walked inside.

Lee suddenly couldn’t breathe as what was left of his heart shattered in his chest. His world spun around him as his chest tightened. Gaara had moved on from him, had cast aside what they had shared as if it was nothing. Tears clouded his vision as he focused on the voice on the other end of the line.  

“Lee, are you okay?” Tenten’s voice said over the phone, sounding worried. “You’re breathing really heavy.” Lee took a shaky breath, shaking his head.

“G-Gaara moved on…I-I thought…” Lee said, fighting back his tears. “I have to go.” He finished quietly as he hung up the phone, practically running down the sidewalk as he tried to get away from those visions of Gaara and Hakuto.

Gaara hadn’t even waited to replace him, hadn’t mourned what they shared together. Did Lee really mean so little to him that Gaara could just walk away? Lee had loved him so deeply, had given everything he could to make the relationship work and what good had it been?

Lee rounded a corner and slammed into something solid.

Lee threw out his hand, landing on the ground hard. Lee groaned in pain as a hand appeared in front of him. He looked up and met light brown eyes, concern hidden in their depths.

“Are you alright?” the man said as Lee took the hand, standing to his feet and quickly wiping his eyes and nose. “I didn’t mean to run into you…” Lee shook his head, trying to stave off another wave of tears. Crying in front of a complete stranger was not something he needed.

“I-I am fine…I just was not looking where I was going.” Lee said apologetically. “I am sorry, thank you for…” Lee felt a hand on his shoulder as the man’s brow wrinkled in concern. Lee felt his heart beat in his chest, this man was very handsome. Taller than Lee by several inches and muscular, he had nice cheek bones and a scar that ran across the side of his pointed chin.

“Your hand is bleeding.” The man pointed out and Lee looked down at his palm. It was a small scrape, not bleeding too severely. Lee smiled up at him sheepishly.

“It is not so bad, I will be fine.” Lee reassured but the man returned his grin with his own, running a hand through his silver hair.

“Well, at least let me get you a coffee or something from the shop.” The man said, pointing towards the coffee shop that was open behind him. “It’s the least I can do since I am the reason you were hurt.” Lee looked up at the man, still a little nervous.

“Only if you let me buy you one as well, to make up for running into you.” Lee countered, falling into step next to the man as they turned towards the building. The man nodded as they walked.

“Sounds fair,” he agreed then smiled again at Lee. “I’m Shira by the way.” Lee’s smile widened as the man opened the door for him.

“My name is Rock Lee.” He said as they walked into the small shop together.

* * *

 

Lee sipped his green tea before continuing the story he was telling about what he and Naruto had gotten up to during their high school days.

“Then my father made anyone who was not suffering from a hangover run laps across the beach. Poor Hinata looked ready to cry when she got back to the house. I felt so guilty.” Lee recounted as Shira laughed.

“Your family sounds like fun. I bet Naruto learned his lesson about dragging you all into schemes after that.” Shira said as he sipped the coffee Lee had gotten him. Lee nodded, feeling at ease for the first time that evening. Shira was pleasant to talk to and Lee found they had a lot in common.

Shira was also a martial artist, moving from Suna to pursue a business degree so he could move up further at his job. Lee laughed and shook his head.

“No he did not because a few months later he convinced the others to help him sabotage the Ferris wheel at the fair so that I…” Lee paused, his speech faltering as he remembered exactly why Naruto had concocted that scheme. His heart ached hollowly in his chest as his face fell.

“So that my ex-boyfriend and I would get together.” Lee finished sadly, watching his tea as he swirled the straw. All the times he and Gaara had spent together came rushing back to him. “I am sorry…we broke up six months ago and I found out he replaced me soon after with a woman today…” Shira shrugged, waving the apology off.

“First love right?” Shira asked, not even flinching at the word “boyfriend” as Lee looked up and nodded.

“I thought he loved me but I guess he was not feeling the same things I was.” Lee sighed, resting his chin on his hand. “Up until today, I kept thinking he would call and we would be able to mend our relationship…wishful thinking I suppose.” Shira reached over, placing his hand over Lee’s.

“I understand that,” Shira said sympathetically. “I just got out of a relationship myself and it can be hard. How long were you two together?” Lee gave Shira a small smile.

“Almost two years.” Lee admitted with a small sigh. Shira nodded, taking a sip from his coffee. Lee felt himself flush slightly. Shira was very handsome, kind and his smile was making the butterflies dance in Lee’s stomach.

“You’ll find someone new and then he’s going to see exactly what he lost.” Shira reassured, taking his hand from Lee’s as the taller man rose. “You seem like a wonderful guy to have.” Lee smiled sheepishly as Shira walked with him out the door. Shira turned to Lee and gave him a quizzical look.

“Do you have a ride home?” Shira asked and Lee shook his head. He had honestly just planned on walking home.

“I only live a few blocks away, I can walk from here.” Lee replied as he turned towards the street. Shira gave him a look then smiled as he jogged next to Lee, his smile bright.

“Let me walk you home.” Shira said as he fell into stride next to Lee. “You shouldn’t walk around alone at night.” Lee turned red and shook his head, lifting his hands in embarrassment.

“Oh no, I can usually take care of myself.” Lee said nervously as Shira shook his head, giving Lee a gentle smile as they started to walk towards Lee’s home.

“I figured but this gives me an excuse to spend more time with you.” Shira said as Lee flushed a deep shade of red. Was Shira flirting with him?

“S-so where are you from originally?” Lee said as they began to walk, putting his hands in his pockets as they turned the corner. Shira shrugged slightly.

“I lived in Suna most of my life, poor family and I started work as soon as I finished high school.” Shira explained as they walked, legs synching into a rhythm that Lee found comforting. “I was denied promotion after promotion by the manager because of my orientation. Even though I was with a woman up until the move, he’d seen me when I was with my ex-boyfriend when I first started.”

Lee nodded, warm wind blowing through his hair as they turned the next street corner and his house came into view. Lee pressed the walking signal and they waited for a moment. Lee bounced on his toes, picking at his sleeve buttons. It was then Lee noticed that Shira had gotten quiet and felt eyes on him. He turned and met Shira’s brown eyes with his own.

The man was staring at him with a small smile and a soft expression. Lee flushed and turned toward the crosswalk and watched the light turn, indicating they should walk. Lee nervously walked forward and turned at the end of the street.

“That’s my house.” Lee said as he lifted his hand to point the small home out, suddenly feeling like a child for saying it that way. Shira nodded, his brow furrowing as if trying to figure something out. Lee stopped in front of the gate that led up to his porch, standing awkwardly as he took out the gate key.

“T-thank you for walking me home, I appreciate i-.” he started to say when Shira interrupted him.

“Do you want to go on a date with me?’ Shira asked suddenly, making Lee stiffen as he registered the question in his mind. “Maybe next Saturday? We could go out for coffee again or go see a movie.” Lee blinked for a moment as he hesitated. Shira seemed nice enough but…

“ ** _Gaara doesn’t want you anymore.”_** His thoughts whispered, making his heart ache as the fresh wounds that had been inflicted on it. **_“He’s moved on and you should do the same. Time to move on, stronger than before.”_**

“Sure, a movie sounds great.” Lee said as Shira burst into a huge grin. Shira took his phone from his pocket, handing it to Lee. Lee quickly punched in his numbers and handed it back to the man.

“Just let me send you a text and then you’ll have mine.” Shira said as he typed away on his phone and a second later, Lee took his phone from his pocket.

**_Hey_ ** **.**

Lee chuckled at the text and looked back up at Shira with a bright smile. Their eyes locked and Lee flushed again as the man took a step forward. Lee felt his breath hitch as Shira leaned down and pressed a light kiss to his lips, so light Lee barely registered the pressure.

When Shira pulled away, he rubbed the back of his head as he turned.

“I’ll text you about the movie later, have a good night.” Shira said as he began to walk away. Lee nodded as he turned toward the gate, shutting it behind him as he walked into the quiet house.

It wasn’t until he was safely locked inside his room that Lee actually took the time to analyze his feelings about the kiss. He laid on his bed, hand over his mouth and staring up at the ceiling.

It had been…new or perhaps different was the word he should use. Over the two years of sharing kisses with Gaara, Lee had grown used to the warmth that filled his heart and spread out to every part of him. He recalled the familiar sparks that lite a fire in his stomach. They had been the same ones from the first kiss as they had been for their last. Even after two years, Gaara’s kisses had never failed to force his brain to shut down.

When Shira had pressed their lips together, Lee had felt nothing. There was no spark, no indicator that Lee had any feelings for the man at all. Shira was nice, kind and handsome, shouldn’t Lee feel some sort of pull towards the man?

Lee sighed as he lifted himself off the bed, gathering his pajamas and walking towards the bathroom. Even if he didn’t feel anything for Shira, Lee needed to move on. Gaara clearly had and Lee couldn’t spend the rest of his life alone just because he still loved the red head.

He would just have to learn how to get along without the man he loved by his side. He could learn to love Shira.

Couldn’t he?

* * *

 

Shikamaru Nara propped his head up on his arms, lite cigarette in his mouth as he took a deep inhale. Temari raised a brow at him as she cuddled into his side but didn’t say anything. Shikamaru sighed, the smoke filling the air around them and disappearing soon after.

“So this lady is blackmailing Gaara into dating her daughter?” Shikamaru said, sounding tired as he put the last of his cigarette out in the ashtray on the nightstand. Temari nodded, her expression darkening as she sat up and the sheets gathered around her bare waist.

“Yeah and our lawyers can’t do anything about it.” Temari said angrily, her eyes narrowing as she played with the hair on Shikamaru’s chest absentmindedly. Shikamaru raised a brow at her, searching her eyes.

“Shrewd women can be such a drag.” Shikamaru said as he looked at Temari. The blond sighed and laid her head on Shikamaru’s chest. “I’ll look into her, see what I can dig up for you.” Temari smirked at him.

“Never thought I’d hear you offering to do something lazy ass.” She teased and Shikamaru let out another heavy sigh. “I must be rubbing off on you.”

Shikamaru chuckled and muttered under his breath.

“Troublesome woman.” He said, tangling his fingers in Temari’s hair. The woman beside him shrugged.

“Gaara’s been through enough in his life without being forced into a loveless relationship.” Temari stated then her expression softened into a sadder one. “Ever since the breakup…I see the cracks in his heart and I keep waiting for him to break. He seems like he’s caught in some kind of stupor that he doesn’t know how to snap out of. I don’t know how to help him when he won’t let me in.” Shikamaru blinked as Temari’s arm draped over him, seeking comfort as her eyes drooped with tiredness.

“It feels like the times before he met Lee and Naruto. He’s just shut off and distant.” Temari whispered as sleep began to drown her thoughts. “I just want my brother to be happy again.” Shikamaru didn’t say a word as Temari fell asleep, laying there for a moment as her breath evened out.

He laid there for a long time, lost in his thoughts and listening to the soft breathing of his girlfriend. Nearly two hours had passed when Shikamaru finally did move, gently guiding Temari off of him. He stopped to look at her for a moment before grabbing his cell phone off the nightstand as well as his pack of cigarettes and stepped out onto the balcony.

He had troublesome calls to make.


	3. DJ Ease My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been nine months since the breakup, three months since Lee agreed to start dating again.  
> Shira is sensible, kind, and is everything Lee could ever ask for in a boyfriend. Charming and endearing and Lee knows he should be happy.  
> But why can't he let himself be comfortable around the man? every touch or movement makes Lee want to run. Lee knows he needs to make a decision but with nagging feelings still residing in his heart, can he truly give himself to Shira?
> 
> Meanwhile, Naruto comes home to Konoha for the summer and finds ways to make trouble.

Naruto got off the bus, taking in the smell of his hometown and smiling brightly. Konoha still looked the same, still felt the same as he headed for the road that led to Kakashi’s house. He had missed his home more than he realized as he walked down the sidewalk.

Everything looked familiar and Naruto felt the warmth expand in his chest. He turned the corner that led up to Kakashi and Gai’s home, sprinting across the street and running straight towards the gate.

He couldn’t wait to see his brother and bushier brows, he couldn’t wait to see Lee and ask how Gaara was doing in Suna. Maybe he’d plan a visit in a couple days to see his friend.

He had this nagging feeling that something was off. He’d had this feeling since he had decided to come home for the summer.

_Naruto stared out the window that was perched just above his desk in his dorm, sighing as he tried to concentrate on signing up for summer classes at his university. There were so many classes to choose from, yet Naruto found he didn’t want to take any of them. The sun was shining, the weather warming up for summer._

_In the back of his mind, Naruto wondered about his home. The summers in Konoha had always been warm. Lee would probably be in class right now and planning for his summer, Sakura would take extra summer classes, Sasuke…_

_Naruto’s heart twinged as he thought of his ex-boyfriend. Just the thought of Sasuke made hurt echo in Naruto’s heart. The Uchiha was probably off in some foreign country now, he hadn’t provided Naruto with a way to follow him. Sasuke must be so lonely out there by himself._

_The mere thought of that made the blond’s heart hurt._

_It was then that Naruto thought back to Lee. Lee had always been the one to help the two of them get along. Naruto wondered if he should have called Lee, asked the other man to come up and keep him company. He couldn’t even recall the last time he even talked to Lee. He should call him._

_Naruto looked up, watching a small squirrel climb across the electric lines just across the street. The little animal moved across the wire carefully until he stepped on an exposed wire at the end of the pole. Sparks flew into the air as the electricity crackled in the air and the squirrel’s lifeless body fell from the post._

Naruto had stared out the window in disbelief for several minutes after that. Had he been superstitious, Naruto would have taken it as an omen. He packed his bags the next day just in case. In his gut, Naruto knew he needed to be home.

Naruto hopped over the gate and walked up the front steps of the porch. He had missed this home. After Jiraiya’s death and Gai’s paralysis, Kakashi had taken it upon himself to move the whole family into his old family home, the one his own father had once owned. Naruto had spent the last year and a half of high school in this house. Despite the memories it carried, it still felt like home.

Naruto didn’t waste any time sticking his key in the lock and throwing the door open. Even the smell of the house was the same as the door opened with a bang.

“Home Sweet home!” Naruto declared loudly as a bewildered Lee blinked up from behind the couch as dogs barked and ran into the room in greeting. He must have jumped up when Naruto had opened the door. The bushy-browed man’s face split into a huge grin once he recognized the face, eyes lighting up.

“Naruto!” Lee exclaimed as the blond dropped his bags at the door and tackled his old friend to the ground. The pair lay in a heap as they laughed, dogs joining the pile with joyful licks and barking.

‘Hey, bushy brows!” Naruto said excitedly, his warm grin spreading out ear to ear. The happiness that had been evading him for the past year finally came blossoming back into his heart. He had really missed Lee and Naruto was glad that while the rest of the world changed, his home seemed to have stayed the same.

“What are you doing here?” Lee said as they finally stood up, Naruto straightened his spine and put his hands on his hips.

“I decided to take the summer off, come back home and reconnect with everyone.” Naruto explained as Lee laid a hand on his shoulder. “I was really missing everyone and I don’t know I got the feeling I was needed and decided to come home for a little while.” Lee nodded.

“Well, I am very glad you are home.” Lee said as he reached forward to hug Naruto. “I missed you Naruto and so did Kakashi and Gai-sensei. They will be home from Gai-sensei’s appointment shortly but dinner should be ready soon!” Naruto wrapped his arms around Lee’s shoulders and hugged back.

“So Lee, how is Gaa-.” Naruto started to say when suddenly, a grey-haired young man about their age appeared from the kitchen. Lee released Naruto’s shoulders and smiled at the man. He scanned Naruto’s form quickly before splitting into a huge grin.

“Lee, is this the famous Naruto I’ve heard so much about?” Shira asked as he walked up to put an arm around Lee’s shoulders, the man was just a little taller than Lee but it looked off-putting and odd to Naruto. Naruto felt his eyebrow raise slightly as he looked back and forth between the men.

“Yes Shira, this is Naruto,” Lee said as he turned to Naruto, taking in his expression and confusion. Lee smiled sheepishly. “Naruto, this is Shira…my…um.” Lee found he couldn’t quite say the words nor could he quite meet Naruto’s eyes.

“I’m his boyfriend for…it’s been like three months now hasn’t it, Lee?” Shira said turning to Lee with a quizzical expression. Lee stiffened slightly as Naruto’s eyes narrowed at him. Lee scratched the back of his head.

“Y-yes, three months now,” Lee answered then smiled to Naruto. “Let us get your things up to your room and get you settled. Shira is just finishing up dinner.” Naruto nodded as Shira smiled at him and then turned to kiss Lee’s cheek.

“Okay, you two take a minute to catch up,” Shira said. “I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me.” Lee smiled and nodded before grabbing Naruto’s bags. He lifted the two suitcases easily and carried them down the hallway.

Lee sighed as Naruto shut the door, surprised his friend had waited until they were out of Shira’s hearing range before he started the questions. Naruto looked confused, hurt and above all angry when he crossed his arms at Lee.

“Want to explain to me what happened between you and Gaara?” Naruto said, caught between wanting to hear Lee’s side of the story and rush to Gaara’s defense. “What the hell happened?” Lee sighed as he laid Naruto’s suitcase out and began absentmindedly unpacking the blond’s things.

“About nine months ago, I went to see Gaara on his birthday…while I was there…” Lee hesitated as the hurt rose to the surface, tearing at his heart and threatening to spill from his eyes. “He was hiding our relationship and the board and the shareholders were all throwing women from prestigious families at him. We fought and Gaara…” Lee took a deep breath, his voice was beginning to shake as he remembered Gaara’s words. Even after all these months, they still stung.

“I said that I did not know our relationship was such a burden…he said that sometimes it was. We broke up and I went home.” Lee finished as he folded some of Naruto’s black t-shirts and put them on the dresser. The simple movements distracted him from the pain, keeping him from tearing up. He needed to be strong.

Naruto bit his lips, his eyebrows crashing down in anger. He wasn’t sure what to do. Lee was clearly still hurting and what Gaara had said had been calloused and cold. But something about this whole situation was off. There was no way Gaara would ever willingly give Lee up, not without a fight.

“Did you try to patch things up?” Naruto asked taking a seat at the end of the bed. “Did you call him…maybe he was just angry.” Lee shook his head and gripped the pair of socks in his hands.

“I called and called, I left voicemails and messages until the inbox was full. Gaara does not want me anymore.” Lee replied quietly, hoping that would be the end of it. Naruto shook his head stubbornly. There was no way, this had to be a misunderstanding. Naruto put his hand on Lee’s shoulder.

“No way Lee, I know Gaara and he would never…” Naruto started to say and Lee turned, glaring at Naruto impatiently. He did not want to talk about this, talking about Gaara only made his heart hurt. He knew Gaara no longer loved him and he accepted that he needed to move on. Naruto needed to accept it too.

“Grow up, Naruto,” Lee said, his patience coming to an end. “This is not high school anymore and people grow apart. We broke up and we are never getting back together. Gaara has moved on and so have I.” Naruto could hear the bitterness in Lee’s voice, so unlike him. Lee was always positive and bright. When everyone else became jaded because of their circumstances, Lee just kept grinning and moving. Lee never gave up on anyone or anything.

Naruto scanned Lee, taking in the stress on his shoulders and the hostility in his stance. When Naruto locked his blue eyes with the round brown ones, he saw hurt and loneliness he had never seen in Lee before. Naruto’s eyes widened as he was hit with the cold realization of what was in front of him.

Whatever Gaara had said or done, whatever Lee meant by “moving on” had broken Lee. He had been shaken to his very core and his heart shattered.

And Naruto wasn’t sure where some of the pieces had disappeared to.

Lee sighed as he walked towards the door, leaving Naruto to finish unpacking by himself. He gripped the knob and let out another heavy sigh.

“Shira is a good man, please give him a chance.” Lee asked before he opened the door. He did not like fighting with Naruto and he desperately wanted for his friend to like his new boyfriend. Maybe if others loved Shira, Lee could learn to as well.

Naruto didn’t turn as he heard Lee leave the room. The blond rubbed his eyes and let out a huff in frustration. Lee was right, the least he could do was try to give this new guy a chance before he wrote him off. Shira had seemed nice and Lee must like him a lot if he was dating the man. Naruto collapsed on the bed with a soft thump as he took in the softness of his bed.

He owed Lee enough to at least try to like this new guy. He could practically hear Sasuke lecturing him on accepting Lee’s new flame.

 _“It doesn’t matter what we think, idiot.”_ Naruto found himself chuckling at the scenario. His heart ached dully as he thought of Sasuke. He needed to try.

Besides, maybe Shira really did make Lee happier than Gaara had.

* * *

 

Gaara sat at his large desk, trying to sort through the reports that lay in front of him and staring at Shikamaru. The lazy man had come to him, requesting to see him alone. Gaara tolerated the man since he made Temari happy. It wasn’t that he wasn’t a good man, more that Gaara knew what he and Temari did behind closed doors.

She was his sister after all.

“Are you going to tell me why you are here Shikamaru?” Gaara said as he looked over the papers in front of him. He normally didn’t go through the monthly finance reports but lately, he had been catching some inconsistencies in the finalized reports. He had a sneaking suspicion that someone was stealing from the company and he wanted to be sure before he brought it to the board.

“Temari is stressed out over the whole situation with you and Hakuto, it’s such a drag.” Shikamaru stated as he took a drag from his cigarette. Gaara wrinkled his nose and tossed the man a glare.

“I can handle the situation myself.” Gaara stated and Shikamaru chuckled. The man put his cigarette in his mouth, holding it there while he took a file from his jacket pocket. He tossed it towards Gaara, pictures falling out of the file and onto Gaara’s papers.

The redhead raised a non-existent brow and looked up at the Nara. He slowly took the pictures in his hand and shuffled through them. His eyes widened as he looked through them.

They were all of Hakuto. Her kissing a male at a small cafe, holding his hand in a small park that he had often visited in his youth, getting into a car with the man outside the movies, sneaking into a back alley with him. Gaara knew he should feel hurt but for the first time in many months, he felt a sense of relief.

This could be his way out of the problem that had plagued him. He looked up at Shikamaru.

“Where did you get these?” he asked, looking up at Shikamaru. The man shrugged and reached out his hands. Gaara passed the photos back to the Nara.

“That’s my cousin, Shigezane.” Shikamaru stated with a small smirk. “I knew he was seeing someone and when I followed Hakuto to see what she was up to, I talked to him. Do what you want with the photos but this kind of scandal could definitely be troublesome for Mrs. Hōki.”

Gaara nodded as he looked back down at his reports.

“You have a plan.” Gaara stated, knowing that Shikamaru’s mind had already thought of the perfect way to expose this whole ordeal. Shikamaru nodded and rose, taking the photos with him.

“I’m off to go put it into motion,” Shikamaru stated then reached into his pocket and drew out his pack of cigarettes. “Oh, and I would look into Tojuro for the inconsistencies in your company finances. He’s got a history but your old man never investigated it further.” Gaara chuckled and nodded.

“Thank you, Shikamaru.” Gaara said gratefully as the Nara took his leave, heading for the door. He waved his hand, not looking at Gaara as he opened the door.

“Don’t mention it.” Shikamaru stated. “It’s just to keep your troublesome sister happy.” Gaara looked back down at his papers and then looked out the window.

His thoughts turned to Lee, what could the man be doing now? Was he doing well, had he met someone new…the thought alone was painful to think about. But it would only be natural. Gaara counted the months in his mind.

“ _Nine months and three days…”_ Gaara thought as he turned to pick up his phone, he flipped it open and scrolled down his contacts. Lee’s number stared back at him, he had been unable to delete the number.

He desperately wanted to hear Lee’s voice, to hear the man laugh and just hear those three words Lee always said to him. Anxiety bit at his heart, filling him with dread.

What if Lee didn’t want to hear from him, the man that had broken his heart and casually tossed it aside? Gaara knew of no words he could say to communicate how sorry he was, how he hadn’t meant to hurt Lee.

Would it just be better to let this lie? To let Lee move on instead of risk hurting him all over again by appearing back into his life. Gaara sighed and turned back to his papers, his heart heavy once more.

He didn’t deserve Lee, maybe now it was time to realize that.

* * *

 

Naruto glared at Shira and Lee from the top of the stairs. The pair had no idea he was silently watching them as they cuddled on the couch, watching some movie at midnight. Shira laid against the couch with Lee cuddled awkwardly in between his legs.

All throughout dinner, Shira had been perfectly nice and Naruto could find no reason to not like the man. In fact, had he not been dating Lee, Naruto was sure he would have loved the guy.

But as Naruto watched the pair as the night went on, watched them interact and speak to each other, he began to notice little things that made him realize why he needed to get involved.

When Lee and Gaara had been together, they had so naturally clicked that it flowed easily. Lee was the abundant energy and enthusiasm to Gaara’s calm demeanor. They balanced out and the pair managed to communicate without words in a way that took others years to manage.

But with Shira, Lee was stiff and awkward. It felt like two puzzle pieces that went together at a glance but when met, didn’t quite fit.

Naruto could see it in the way Lee stiffened when Shira touched him, the awkward way Lee danced around actually kissing Shira and Naruto knew right away what Lee was doing. He had known Lee long enough to know when his heart wasn’t into something.

Lee was pretending, pretending to move on from Gaara. Shira may not have been able to see it but Naruto certainly could. It wasn’t fair to either of the men.

Naruto rose, walking towards his room and leaving the pair alone. He decided that he could, at least, try to sleep before driving to Gaara’s the next day. Suna was two hours away by car and he needed to talk to Gaara.

Something about this situation wasn’t right and Naruto didn’t care what Lee said, Gaara still loved Lee and Naruto was going to make him realize that.

Even if he had to knock the sense into his friend first.

* * *

 

“I think Naruto has finally stopped glaring at us.” Shira chuckled, sitting up slightly to wrap his arms around Lee. “Is he always this protective?” Lee stiffened for a moment before relaxing into Shira’s arms, leaning his back against the strong chest.

“Sometimes, I think he forgets that I can make my own decisions.” Lee said as Shira rested his chin on his shoulder. “It does not help that he is still friends with…my ex.” Shira nodded, pressing his lips to Lee’s neck.

“Don’t think about him right now, it’ll only depress you.” Shira stated and Lee let out a sigh as Shira kissed along his shoulder. Lee’s breathing hitched as rough hands wandered under his shirt and up his torso. Uneasiness filled Lee’s gut as Shira’s hands moved downward.

“Shira…I do not think…” Lee said, trying to move away. He was hyper aware of Shira’s touch and for some reason, the thought of what Shira was trying to instigate made his stomach twist with anxiety. The other man blinked at Lee, releasing him and letting him scoot to the other side of the couch.

Lee didn’t look up, he didn’t want to see the disappointment in Shira’s eyes. Shira had hinted at wanting to take their relationship further. He knew Lee was a virgin in almost every sense of the word and didn’t try to pressure him but whenever Lee refused, he could see the uncertainty and disappointment in Shira’s eyes.

“C-can we take this slower…maybe go up to my room and…um…” Lee said, attempting to make this work. It wasn’t fair to Shira for him to refuse every time the man instigated something, to only accept small, chaste kisses because every touch made Lee feel skittish and uncomfortable.

Shira blinked at him, a soft smile lifting the disappointment from his face. Shira gently extended his hand to Lee, letting the man hesitantly take the hand. Lee felt himself being led down the hall and he took a deep breath.

They entered his room, shutting the door and locking it. The house was fairly quiet but he could hear his fathers’ T.V. and Naruto’s snoring from down the hall. They just needed to be careful but Lee was sure they would be undisturbed.

He turned to Shira, willing his hands not to shake as Shira wrapped his arms around his waist. Lee took a deep breath as Shira pulled him into a kiss, sliding his tongue along the seam of Lee’s lips. Lee hesitantly opened his mouth, trying not to focus on his mind screaming at him that this wasn’t right.

Shira’s hands slid up Lee’s shirt, rough and calloused against the softer skin as it ran up Lee’s hard abs. Shira broke the kiss as he lifted the shirt over Lee’s head and latched onto his neck. Lee moaned involuntarily as Shira nipped at his collarbone.

Lee copied Shira’s movements, taking off the other man’s shirt and tossing it aside. Shira pushed Lee back onto the bed, pinning him beneath him as he slipped his fingers under Lee’s pants. Lee whimpered as Shira pulled his pants down.

“S-Shira…” Lee said, trying to quell nausea in his stomach. Shira smirked as he lowered his mouth to Lee’s ear. The hot breath felt odd, uncomfortable. He wasn’t getting any reaction out of his body at all if Shira saw that…

“Just relax, let me show you what to do.” Shira said as he began nipping down Lee’s chest, leaving small marks as he did. Shira just thought he was nervous and that was why he wasn’t hard yet. Lee bit his lip, staring at the ceiling and trying to focus on what his body was feeling. He gripped the sheets with his hands, taking a deep breath.

He needed to think about something else, something that would make this more bearable. Lee let his mind wander as Shira nipped at his hip bones. Gaara’s face came into his mind as he closed his eyes. Lee’s heart leaped at the thought of the redhead, the thought that the lips on his body belonged to Gaara.

Lee whimpered as Shira nuzzled his balls through the fabric of his boxers, sliding them off easily. As the rough hand grasped the base of his hardening cock, warm lips capped over the head and licked the slit. Lee let his mind cling to the thought of Gaara.

Lee gasped, his body reacting to the touch as he thought of what Gaara would look like as he sucked Lee off. Gaara’s pale cheeks flushed pink as he licked up the shaft, nibbling gently on the veins. Gaara’s lips kissing the head of Lee’s cock, lapping at the head before taking it into his hot mouth to suck.

Lee was panting now, hips thrusting lightly as the Gaara of his mind’s eyes took him fully down his throat. Lee could feel the heat pooling in his abdomen, his breathing heavy as he felt his end getting closer.

“G-Gaara,” Lee whispered, eyes snapping open the second the name left his lips. Shira stopped suddenly. It was a moment before he lifted his head slowly, eyes blinking as his mind processed what Lee had just said. He pulled away slowly, rising to his feet.

“Were you…were you picturing your ex while I was giving you head?” Shira asked, voice heavy with disbelief and hurt. Lee rose to a sitting position on his bed, blinking up at Shira as he tried desperately to figure out what to say. Shira glared down at Lee, taking his silence as an admittance of guilt.

“My god, I am such an idiot.” Shira said as he picked his shirt up off the floor, throwing it on as Lee rose, managing to pull on his boxers as Shira moved towards the door.

“Shira wait, I didn’t mean to-.” Lee started to say as Shira turned, eyes blazing with hurt and jealousy. Lee pulled his hand back as Shira sighed heavily.

“I’ve tried to be patient Lee but I can’t wait forever for you to decide to have sex with me.” Shira said, the frustration leaking into his voice. “I know how hard it is to get over someone you love but Lee, I want this relationship to work but for it to work you have to, at least, try to be intimate with _Me_ not the memory of your ex-boyfriend. I can’t keep forcing you to touch me, to actually let me in…” Shira trailed off as he rubbed his eyes.

Lee opened his mouth to speak, trying to find the words to comfort his boyfriend. None came as Shira looked at him, hurt shining in his eyes. He turned towards the bedroom door.

“Make up your mind Lee,” Shira said, his back still turned to Lee. “Do you want me, someone, who cares about you now or do you want to dwell on the past about someone who hasn’t even called you in months?” Lee hung his head, staring at his feet as Shira opened the door and left the room.

Lee sighed, shutting the door before walking back over to his bed and sitting on the end of it. Lee stared at his hands and let his thoughts wander once again. Guilt filled his heart as he realized he was still hard, aching for release.

Reaching for the lotion by his nightstand, Lee pumped some into his hand as he slipped his boxers off. His breath hitched as he let his hand wander down his own body. He let him mind wander to Gaara again. Lee bit his lip as he gripped his half-hard length, coaxing back to full hardness as he pictured Gaara writhing beneath him.

Gaara looking up at him, eyes heavy with lust and need as Lee pressed his fingers into him. Lee panted as he thought about Gaara’s tight body beneath him and increased the pressure of his hand.

“Gaara.” Lee said softly, stroking himself and slowly picking up his speed. He moaned as he ran his thumb over the head of his cock, gathering precum and using it as more lube to increase his speed.

“G-Gaara,” Lee whispered, wanting so desperately to hear Gaara’s voice whisper his name, feel the soft hands on his chest, feel those soft lips against his. Pressing his fist to his mouth, Lee tried to keep his moans at bay.

He came hard, spurting hot seed onto his hand and whimpering Gaara’s name into his other. He collapsed onto his bed, staring at the ceiling. Lee lay there for a moment, panting and breathing heavily as he came down from his high.

Guilt ate at his heart. Shira was right, he was still living in the past. No matter how hard he tried, Lee simply could not move on. He still loved Gaara and he could not give himself completely to Shira while his heart still loved another.

Lee stood, wiping his hands on his boxers and walking over to his pants to pick them up off the floor. Shira was right, he needed to stop looking back. He needed to move on but even when he tried to picture a life with Shira, he found he couldn’t. Lee could close his eyes and picture his future. All he could see was a red headed man by his side.  

But Gaara hadn’t even called him in nine months, hadn’t checked to make sure he was okay or anything. The man he was so helplessly in love with and wanted to spend the rest of his days with, hadn’t cared enough to make sure he was okay.

The urge to call Gaara was too strong to ignore now and Lee searched the pants for his phone, swearing mentally as he realized he must have left it in Shira’s car from their lunch date earlier in the day. He glanced over at the house phone that still rested on his nightstand.

He lifted the phone, dialing the familiar number with a practiced ease. The phone rang and on the third ring, someone picked up.

 ** _“Hello, No Subaku residence.”_** A pretty, feminine voice said. Lee knew instantly that it was not Temari’s voice.

And his heart sunk to his ankles.

* * *

 

Hakuto smiled at Gaara as he dozed on the couch, papers strewn all over and his night shirt practically swallowing his small frame. She meant to ask why he always wore the same green shirt to bed but never got around to it.

She picked up the papers, straightening them and laying them on the coffee table. Gaara was a light sleeper, a fact she had discovered during these late nights when she stayed late. She took extra care covering Gaara’s body with a blanket, smiling as he murmured in his sleep. Hakuto sighed, eyes looking sad as she glanced over the man’s soft features.

Gaara was genuinely a nice man, kind and considerate. He was handsome and well-spoken as well as next in line for his families company, all the things her mother wanted her to have in a future husband. Part of her wished she could fall for him. Not just to please her mother but because behind those soft teal eyes, Hakuto could see the pain that Gaara kept hidden.

She saw it every time he looked at her and sometimes Hakuto wished she could heal it but her heart belonged to someone else. Shigezane, just the thought of the dark haired man made her heart skip a beat. They had been together for almost three years now and even though he wasn’t in line for the business empire his last name tied him too, she loved his kind heart and strong spirit.

But as long as her mother had her way, Hakuto would belong to Gaara. Even though the red head only seemed to put half his energy into the relationship, going through the motions. He barely touched her, kissed her only when in front of cameras, never tried to sleep with her. Hakuto suspected that Gaara really didn’t want a relationship with her either. If he didn’t want to have Hakuto as his girlfriend then why did he even bother dating her?

The phone rang and Hakuto walked over to it, answering it cheerfully despite the late hour.

“Hello, No Subaku residence.”  She chirped, hearing a sharp intake of breath from the other end.

 ** _“Um yes, this is Rock Lee…I was just calling to speak to Gaara.”_** A soft sounding male voice said, **_“Is he home?”_** Hakuto turned towards the couch, noting that Gaara was still sound asleep.

“He’s asleep at the moment but maybe I can help you?” Hakuto asked. “Are you a friend of his?” the man made a small noise and sighed.

 ** _“Y-yes, we went to high school together in Konoha…I came to visit a few months ago for Gaara’s birthday…I may have left one of my shirts there.”_** Lee said, sounding sad as he struggled to speak. **_“It’s green with a dragon on the front…”_** Hakuto’s eyes widened.

She had seen the shirt, it was the one Gaara wore to bed every night. The wheels in her mind turned as the pieces suddenly clicked together. So that was why Gaara never wanted to touch her, why he seemed so sad. Gaara liked men. Did he love the man on the end of the phone, did Gaara long to be with this man the way she longed to be with Shigezane? Hakuto’s face softened.

“I have seen it, Gaara wears that shirt to bed every night.” She said smiling, hoping that she could give the man on the other end of the line some comfort. “He’s very attached to it…” The voice on the end went quiet for a moment and, at first, she thought nothing of the quiet.

Then she heard a quiet sniff and a sharp intake of breath before she heard a reply, voice thick as Lee tried to hide his emotions but failed.

“I-I have to go…” Lee said with a quiet sob as he hung up suddenly. Hakuto pulled the phone away and stared at it for a moment. Hakuto felt guilt grip her heart. Lee sounded hurt, heart broken. Why was Gaara seeing her if he had someone who clearly cared about him very much in Konoha?

There was a rustle from the couch as Gaara rose, rubbing his eyes. He looked up at Hakuto tiredly, his hair in disarray. The shirt stuck out even more on him now that Hakuto knew the significance.

“Hakuto…I’m sorry I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Gaara said, turning to set his feet on the floor. “Let me get you home.”  Hakuto stared at him, her mind putting all the pieces together as she walked over to the couch and took a seat next to the red head. She stared at her hands, taking a deep breath as Gaara moved to pick up his papers again, searching for his keys.

“Gaara, who is Rock Lee?” She asked softly. Gaara stiffened, pulling his hand away from the papers. He brought them to his lap, staring at them for a moment.

“He’s just…an old friend.” Gaara replied, his voice quiet. He didn’t want to talk about this. Hakuto bit her lip and decided to press forward.

“If he is just a friend then why do you wear his shirt to bed?” She said and Gaara’s head snapped up to stare at her. He looked her over warily.

“How…what makes you think it’s his?’ Gaara snapped, clearly irritated. Hakuto looked up at him, her eyebrows wrinkling in concern as she reached for Gaara’s hand.

“Lee called, just a few moments ago looking for it.” She explained quietly. “I think he was calling to talk to you, he sounded like he was upset.” A look of guilt passed over Gaara’s face.

“I…He is my bo-.” Gaara started to say, stopping to correct himself. “My ex-boyfriend. We broke up nine months ago because I didn’t trust him. I haven’t spoken to him since the breakup, I don’t deserve to have him back.” Gaara stopped, rubbing his eyes and giving a heavy sigh.

“You love him.” Hakuto guessed, her heart aching for Gaara as she took in his hurt expression. “And when he was on the phone he sounded very hurt when I answered. You need to speak to him Gaara.” Gaara shook his head and sighed.

“I am with you now. He’s bound to have seen it.” Gaara said quietly. Hakuto let out a sigh and crossed her arms. She hadn’t wanted to do this but she couldn’t stand to see the man who had been so kind to her looking so heart broken and miserable.

“I’m seeing someone else.” Hakuto stated as Gaara looked up at her. “His name is Shigezane Nara…I was seeing him well before we started dating.” Gaara blinked at her then his mouth twitched in a small smile.

“I know, Shikamaru showed me the photos he took.” Gaara stated and Hakuto turned bright red. So that was why Shigezane needed to speak to his cousin. Shikamaru may be very lazy and often looked bored, but he was very intelligent.

“Then why are you still dating me?” Hakuto asked incredulously, why would Gaara agree to a loveless relationship when he had a man who clearly loved him? Then it hit her, why her mother had even suggested the relationship.

“What did my mother do?” Hakuto questioned quietly, clenching her small fists in her lap. Gaara raised a non-existent brow at her. Hakuto was more intelligent than Gaara had given her credit for.

“She has a picture of Lee and I, sharing a kiss and she threatened to expose me if I did not cooperate.” Gaara explained, crossing his arms across his chest. “It wouldn’t be fair to Lee to ask him to come back to me only to have to watch me parade around with a woman in public. So I have not spoken to him.” Hakuto bit her lip and lay her hand over Gaara’s.

“What’s he like?” Hakuto asked, searching Gaara’s face as he looked over at her. “Lee, I mean.” Gaara looked up at the ceiling, a small smile on his lips as he thought about Lee.

“He’s loud, confident and optimistic. He always gives his all in whatever he does and never gives up on anything. When we met, I ended up badly hurting him and he still tried to be my friend, still forgave me despite almost causing the end of his dreams.” Gaara said, closing his eyes as he remembered. “He loves with all he has, never holds anything he feels back. My only regret when we were together is that I was too much of a coward to tell him how much he meant to me.”

Hakuto’s breath caught in her chest at the emotion she saw in Gaara’s eyes, the hurt. Her mother had caused that hurt in this man who had shown her nothing but kindness. Tears gathered in her eyes as she buried her hands in her face. Gaara looked up when he heard her sob.

“I am so sorry…” she said softly as Gaara laid a hand on her shoulder. Hakuto looked up at him as he shook his head.

“It isn’t your fault.” Gaara said gently. “Even if your mother did decide to let this go, I doubt I would mend things with Lee…” Hakuto nodded as she wiped her eyes, sniffing.

“But it still isn’t right.” She stated as she took a deep breath. “Is there anything I can do? Maybe I can find the picture.” Gaara shook his head, sighing in defeat.

“She’s bound to have copies everywhere…it would be easiest to just let her have what she wants.” Gaara said sadly. Hakuto laid her hand over his, eyes determined.

“You should still call Lee, explain what is happening.” Hakuto suggested, handing Gaara his phone as she rose. She needed to get home and take care of some things.

“I will see you tomorrow, I need to go home and think about some things.” Hakuto said as she walked to the door. She looked back briefly as she pulled on her coat. Gaara was staring at his phone, face contorted with a mix of pain and longing.

“Have a good night Gaara.” Hakuto said quietly, leaving with a small click as the door closed. She walked down the hall as her shoulders slumped in her depression. As she rounded the corner and stopped by the elevator, Hakuto placing her hand in her pocket.

She pulled out a small diamond ring from it. Shigezane had proposed to her earlier that day, asking her to run away with him and leave her old life behind. He had gotten a job offer and a house in Konoha. All she needed to do was say yes.

Hakuto stared at it as she turned the ring, staring at the inscription lining the inner parts of the ring. She smiled as she read the words.  

**_No matter what, I’ll always love you_ **

The inscription made her heart ache as she recalled Shigezane’s proposal and her need to think. She clutched the ring in her hand before sliding it onto her left ring finger. If getting what she wanted meant making this decision, then she would be the one to make it.

It was time to take what she stopped caring about what others wanted, it was time to make her own decision.

* * *

 

It was three a.m. when Lee finally stopped the tears, his heart still raw from his talk with Hakuto. After hearing the woman say what Gaara wore to bed, he’d lost interest in the conversation. Hakuto must have slept with Gaara to know what he wore to bed.

Lee’s heart felt heavy as he thought about all the months he had spent, trying to get Gaara to trust him enough to let him show him how much he loved him. He had wanted so desperately to share his first time with Gaara, to be Gaara’s first.

It seemed like some dreams needed to be given up on.

Lee rose, throwing on his pants and hoodie as he grabbed his keys off his nightstand. He glanced at the clock as it blinked three a.m. at him. If Gaara had truly moved on, then he had one last chance to move on himself.

Lee walked down the hallway, leaving a note by the coffee pot for his father’s in the morning as he made his way to the door. He slipped on his shoes and walked out the door to his car.

Lee drove to Shira’s apartment, heart hammering in his chest. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he parked outside, gripping the steering wheel in sweating hands. Was he really ready to do this? Did he really want to give himself to Shira, a man he wasn’t even sure he loved yet?

But waiting for someone to love him enough to share his first time with had ended in heartbreak before and people slept with people they did not love all the time. Even Kakashi, although he did not tell Lee himself, had slept with people before Gai. Sometimes, sex was just sex.

Lee steeled his nerves, taking a deep breath as he got out of his car and headed up to the apartment door. He rang Shira’s room, hoping the man was still up. A groggy voice answered over the intercom.

“Who is it?” Shira grumbled, irritation in his voice. Lee bit his lip and took a deep breath to calm his nerves. He pressed the button on the intercom.

“Shira, it is Lee. Please open up I need to talk to you.” Lee asked and a long silence stretched over him. The door to the complex opened with a beep, allowing Lee to enter. He walked inside, jogging up the steps to the third floor and to Shira’s apartment.

The man answered the door, eyes scanning Lee as he held the door open slightly. He looked angry still as he sighed and leaned against the door frame.

“What do you want Lee?” Shira said, crossing his arms in front of his bare chest. Lee bounced his weight from one leg to the other as he took a deep breath. He met Shira’s brown eyes with his own.

“You told me earlier that I needed to make a decision. That I needed to choose between you and a memory that I cannot seem to forget.” Lee said as Shira nodded, eyebrows furrowing.

“Yes, I get the feeling you’ve thought about it.” Shira said as he straightened his body, preparing for the breakup he sensed was coming. Lee nodded and fought the butterflies in his gut down. He bit his lip and wrestled the instincts screaming at him.

“I did.” Lee said, taking a step forward and pressing his lips against Shira’s in a heated kiss. Shira’s eyes widened as he lifted his arms around Lee’s waist, closing his eyes as he settled into the kiss. Lee pulled away, looking at his feet as he fought the uneasiness in his heart.

“Help me forget, Shira.” Lee asked softly, looking up at the man with pained eyes. He needed to forget, needed to move on. Shira blinked down at Lee, eyes softening as he pulled the man into his home and shut the door.

Lee tried to remain calm as Shira pressed his lips to his again, licking the seam of his lips and requesting entry. Lee allowed it, feeling uncomfortable as Shira’s hands wandered up his shirt and his tongue invaded his mouth. He tried to copy Shira’s movements as he pulled Lee’s shirt over his head, latching onto his throat to nip and suckle the soft flesh.

Lee whimpered as Shira moved him backward, directing him to the bedroom as Lee tried to regulate his increased heartbeat. Lee managed to pull away long enough to ease his shaking hands over Shira’s pajama bottoms, sliding them off to reveal Shira’s growing arousal.

He pushed Shira onto the end of the bed, taking a deep breath as he fought the wave of nausea. Every part of his mind telling him to stop, that he shouldn’t be doing this but Lee ignored it. He couldn’t stop, wouldn’t stop. He would see this through to the end.

Lee bit his lip, unraveling the bandages around his arms slowly. Shira’s eyes widened as the scars on Lee’s arms were revealed, eyes looking up at Lee’s face when the final scar was revealed. Lee shook his head as he lowered himself to his knees and wrapped his hand around the base of Shira’s cock.

“I will tell you about those later.” Lee explained, looking up at Shira as he stroked the hard length, earning a sharp intake of breath from Shira. “T-tell me if I do this wrong…I have never done anything like this before.” Lee tried not to shake as he licked the dripping head of Shira’s cock.

Shira looked down at Lee as he capped his mouth over the head, sucking on it lightly. He threaded his fingers through Lee’s hair as the man lapped at the slit inside his mouth.

“That’s good.” Shira managed as Lee looked up at him. “Move your hand up and down a bit, Lee.” Shira took a sharp breath as Lee followed his instructions, moving his hand while sucking on the head.

“God Lee, just like that.” Shira rumbled, the grip on Lee’s hair. “You can suck a little harder…please take all of it.” Lee closed his eyes as he pulled away slightly and looked up at Shira, swallowing his discomfort as Shira looked down at him.

“P-please Shira…do not hold back. I can handle it.” Lee said, steeling his resolve as Shira’s grip on his hair tightened. “D-do whatever makes you happy. I want to make you feel good.” The man’s eyes darkened a bit.

“Are you sure?” Shira asked, hooking his finger under Lee’s chin. “I can be a bit rough.” Lee nodded, wetting his dry lips as he looked up at Shira and willing his body not to shake. Shira gripped Lee’s hair again.

“Then open your mouth like a good little whore.” Shira said. Lee’s mouth unhinged at the rough tone of Shira’s voice and he let the man guide his head down onto his hard cock. Lee fought his gag reflex as Shira forced himself down Lee’s throat.

Tears welled in Lee’s eyes but he grabbed on Shira’s thighs as the man guided his head back. Shira moaned as Lee followed the man’s rhythm. Lee sucked, willing the contents of his stomach to stay there as Shira roughly fucked his mouth.

It felt like hours before Shira released Lee’s hair and let him stand on shaky legs, sore from staying in one position too long. Shira rose, pulling Lee to him and letting rough hands wander down Lee’s body.

Lee gasped as Shira nipped and suckled down his neck, leaving marks in his wake. Lee’s pants fell to the floor as Shira undid the button of Lee’s jeans. Lee shivered as his half-hard length was released. Shira ran a thumb over Lee’s nipple, growling softly in his ear as Lee let out a whimper.

“The whole world will know you’re mine now.” Shira said as he pushed Lee back onto the bed, laying over Lee and reaching over him to open his nightstand drawer. Lee’s heart constricted, making it hard to breathe as he tried to just let himself enjoy this. Lee followed Shira’s hand as it pulled out the lube.

Lee’s heart hammered in his chest, worry filling his gut as Shira moved to massage his entrance. His father had always taught him that gloves should be worn during the process of stretching, just to keep things clean. He bit his lip to keep from questioning as Shira gently prodded Lee’s hole.

“Relax and let me stretch you,” Shira said softly, rough tone gone in favor of a gentler tone. “I don’t want to hurt you.” Lee nodded as he took a deep breath, trying to relax his tense muscles as Shira pushed one lube coated finger into him.

It felt odd, uncomfortable as Shira pulled the finger in and out of Lee for a moment before inserting the second one. Lee groaned as he stretched, panting as his body began to react on its own. Shira poured more lube onto his hand as he scissored his fingers.

“Ah!” Lee cried as Shira inserted a third finger, brushing what Lee guessed was his prostate as he pulled them in and out. It felt good, despite Lee’s tense muscles as he tried to let himself enjoy it. He wanted to tell Shira to stop, to tell him he wasn’t ready.

“God, this hungry little ass of yours is just pulling my fingers in.” Shira growled as he fanned his fingers out slowly to stretch Lee even more. Lee gripped the sheets in his hands as he closed his eyes, trying to fight past the wave of anxiety he was feeling.

He couldn’t stop now, he needed to push through if he wanted to move on. This was the only way to erase Gaara from his mind, to move on to something better. He could do this last thing if it meant he could finally be free from the heartache in his chest.

Shira brushed his prostate again, bringing his mouth down to suck roughly on the head of Lee’s hardening cock. Lee moaned as Shira removed his fingers and reached for the box of condoms on his nightstand. Lust filled brown eyes looked down at Lee as the lump in his throat grew.

He wasn’t sure he’d be able to look Shira in the eyes while they had sex. Just looking up at him now made Lee feel uncomfortable and skittish. His heart pounded in his chest as Lee tried to come up with a way this could work.

“I’ll start slowly, it may take a moment for you to adjust to me.” Shira said as he moved to open Lee’s legs, positioning himself at Lee’s entrance. Lee stopped Shira’s hand, looking up at him. Shira raised a brow, waiting to hear Lee say he’d changed his mind.

“Do you want to stop now?’ Shira asked, searching Lee’s eyes as the man opened his mouth, trying to find his voice. Lee desperately wanted to tell Shira to stop but he took a deep breath and shook his head.  

“Can…Can you do it from behind?’ Lee suggested, cheeks turning bright red as he swallowed thickly. “I-I heard that positions better for the first time.” Shira blinked down at him and nodded, letting Lee up so he could turn. Lee pushed himself up on all fours, staring out the window above Shira’s bed as the man moved behind him.

“Lee, I’m going to push the head in.” Shira said, gently massaging Lee’s hip bones. “Just try to relax and let it pull me in. it might hurt a bit but if it feels like too much tell me and I will stop.” Lee nodded and took a deep breath as he felt Shira push against him, trying to relax. He shut his eyes as he fought back the urge to say no.

Lee felt his ass stretch, opening to accommodate Shira’s cock as he slowly pushed in. Lee wasn’t sure he liked this but he gripped the sheets beneath him as he gritted his teeth. Shira stopped ever so often, giving Lee time to adjust before he finally pushed all the way in.

It wasn’t painful, not really. Lee found the small burn somewhat arousing as Shira wrapped his arm around Lee’s chest as the other laid beside Lee’s, keeping Shira’s whole weight off of Lee. Lee shivered as he felt Shira kiss between his shoulder blades.

“God, you’re so tight.” Shira growled, fingers running down Lee’s torso and tweaking his nipples as he sucked another love bit on Lee’s shoulder. Lee knew he would be covered in them by morning.

Minutes ticked by, clicking with the sound of Lee’s heartbeat until the burn finally subsided. Lee swallowed again as he took a shaky breath.

“I-I think I am ready for you to move now.” Lee said quietly. Shira pulled out slightly as he straightened, running his hand down Lee’s back. Shira pushed in slowly, grunting in pleasure as he did. Lee’s body started to feel warm, slowly getting more aroused as Shira found a slow rhythm. Lee whimpered as he started to pant, his cock dripping onto the bed as Shira grunted.

“Such a good little slut,” Shira growled as he grabbed Lee’s hips in a bruising grip. “Just feel how much your ass wants my cock.” Lee gasped as Shira picked up speed, his ass protesting slightly as he gritted his teeth. He was not sure he enjoyed being treated like this.

He focused on the wall, tears filling his vision as he fought the pain. His mind wandered to Gaara and Lee bit his lip. No, he could not think of the red head now.

“Tell me how much you want my cock.” Shira murmured as he pulled out and slammed back in, making Lee cry out when he slammed against his prostate, sending an involuntary jolt of pleasure through Lee. “Say that you’re a dirty little cock slut.” Lee whimpered, breathing heavy as Shira’s hand slapped his ass hard.

“I-I’m a d-dirty little cock slut.” Lee managed, his heart twinging in his chest as Shira picked up speed again. He could hear the slapping of flesh hitting flesh now as Shira moved in and out of him. Lee found another spot on the wall to focus on, trying to clear his mind and just enjoy this.

He couldn’t help but wonder if Gaara would be like this if the red head would prefer to have Lee on top. Gaara would need a gentler hand, soft and loving as Lee moved inside of him. Lee shook the thoughts from his head.

It didn’t matter how desperately his heart wanted it to be Gaara that was inside him now, if he thought of Gaara he might accidentally say his name. That had already resulted in disaster before.

Shira mounted him, pressing Lee into the sheets as he kept pounding into him. Lee groaned as Shira’s hand wrapped around his cock, stroking him roughly as Shira chuckled in his ear.

“I bet he never touched you like this.” Shira growled, thrusts beginning to hit Lee’s prostate with every slap of flesh. “Say my name the way you said his, moan for me like a good little whore.” Lee gritted his teeth, irritation rising in his chest. Lee did not appreciate the way Shira was talking about Gaara.

Gaara may not love him anymore but Lee still loved him. Despite all his flaws, Lee never doubted that Gaara was a good person. He did not deserve for Shira to speak that way of him. Lee bit back his anger, feeling as his body gave into the sensations of his orgasm building higher.

He didn’t want to enjoy this as Shira continued his assault on Lee’s prostate. Making heat building at the base of Lee’s spine. Lee gasped and moaned in pleasure, his body betraying him as it grew closer to climax.  

“S-Shira.” Lee tried to moan, voice shaking in his nervousness. Shira smirked to himself as he increased his speed, thrusts losing all sense of rhythm as his hot breath met Lee’s sweat covered skin. Lee felt his own end building despite his lack of enjoyment. Shira’s hand increased speed as Lee closed his eyes and came with a soft whimper before collapsing on the bed.

“I’m not done with you yet.” Shira chuckled as Lee's knees gave out. Shira pulled out for a moment, turning Lee onto his side and getting behind him once more. Lee bit his fist, not wanting Shira inside him any longer but allowing it. He needed to finish what he had started.

He felt sick, strange as Shira resumed his thrusts into him. He could feel Shira move in and out of him now but Lee stared at the wall, too tired to get aroused again. Shira whispered things into Lee’s ears but Lee had long since stopped hearing him. He let Shira thrust into him, whimpering as the other man suckled more marks all over his neck, shoulders and back.

Shira came with a soft grunt, his cock pulsing inside of Lee as he filled the condom. Shira lay there for several moments, breathing heavily into Lee’s shoulder before he finally pulled out. Shira turned onto his back, panting as the sweat shined on his skin.

Lee rolled onto his side, watching Shira pull off the condom and tossed it aside before turning to Lee with a smile. Lee closed his eyes as Shira stroked his arm, eyes trailing over the slowly darkening love bites.

“Are you okay?” Shira asked, face looking over Lee’s in concern. “Did you enjoy yourself?” Lee put on a wide smile, masking the aching in his chest as he nodded.

“Yes, it was…great.” Lee managed as he turned in Shira’s arms, letting the man wrap them around his waist and press his chest against Lee’s back. Lee sighed as Shira pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades.

Soon, Shira’s soft breathing filled the room as he fell asleep. Lee bit his lip, pulling the pillow beneath his head to his chest as Shira rolled over. The man’s arm rolled off of him as Lee curled in on himself.

He felt dirty, used and empty as he laid there. He pressed his face into the pillow, fighting against the ache in his chest. Even though this act was supposed to erase Gaara from his mind, Lee found himself craving the red head’s company even more in this moment after.

A lump developed in Lee’s throat as he blinked back the tears. He pulled the pillow closer as he fought to find sleep. Lee just wanted to be free of this loneliness but somehow, sleeping with Shira had only caused it to grow. Lee buried his face in the pillow just as the sun peaked over the horizon.

He rose from bed, body aching as he looked for his clothes. Shira was still sound asleep as Lee gathered his shirt and pulled it over his head. He winced as his backside gave a sharp twinge of protest with every movement, trying to stay silent to keep from waking Shira.

Lee managed to pull on his pants, walking to the phone to leave a note on the pad. He glanced back at Shira for a moment as he bit his lip. Lee knew he shouldn’t leave, not after what had happened mere hours before. Lee shook his head as he wrote out his note.

**_Dad called, needs me at Dojo. I will talk to you later. Lee_ **

Lee nodded, pleased with the note as he gathered himself enough to walk towards the door. He stole one last glance at Shira’s sleeping form. His heart twinged dully as he turned towards the door. Lee sighed as he headed out the door, closing it with a soft click behind him.

Maybe some time away from Shira would help Lee get rid of the regret that hummed deep in his chest.


	4. Broken Together

Naruto awoke groggily, mumbling as he sat up in his bed. He rubbed his eyes and glanced at the clock. He groaned when it read seven a.m. at him, wondering what had woken him up.

Then he heard talking coming from the kitchen and rose from his bed, swinging the door open as he padded down the hallway in his bare feet. He grumbled as he rounded the corner into the room.

“Kakashi, Bushier Brow, can’t ya keep it down!” He said with a growl. “Some of us are trying to sle-.” Then his eyes landed on a pretty, pale girl around his age sitting at the table as she leaned over to pet Pakkun on the head. Her hair was black, falling to her shoulders as she looked up at Naruto with wide brown eyes.  Kakashi looked up at Naruto while Gai glared at him.

“Naruto, be polite we have a guest.” Gai scolded as he wheeled to the sink with the dishes from breakfast. “Please continue what you were saying Ms. Hōki.” Naruto raised a brow as the girl smiled kindly up at him, reminding him vaguely of Hinata.

“Hello, I’m Hakuto.” She greeted, shifting in her seat. “Is Rock Lee a friend of yours?” Naruto nodded, confused as he looked around. Lee was usually up by now, maybe he was still out on his morning run.

“Yeah, Lee’s like my brother,” Naruto asked and looked the girl over. “But who the hell are you?” Gai looked at him, jaw clenching as he gave Naruto a look.

“Naruto, language.” Gai chastised as he rolled back over to sit near Kakashi. The silver haired man laughed. Hakuto cleared her throat as Bull laid his head in her lap and the girl’s tense shoulders relaxed a bit.

“Um, I guess you could say that I’m a friend of Gaara’s.” She said staring at the tea Gai had made her. “I really need to speak to Lee. It’s rather important.” Naruto took a seat at the table, dragging some of the eggs in the center of the table onto a plate.

“He’s out at the moment,” Gai said, a dark cloud of worry passing over his eyes. “I’m not really sure when he’ll-.” Suddenly, the sound of the door opening and closing alerted them to the arrival of Lee.

Naruto was up like a shot, walking towards the living room to greet Lee. His bright grin faded when he laid eyes on his friend.

Lee looked tired, his eyes holding a pain that masked the usual happiness Lee radiated. Naruto cocked his head as Lee turned to him and stiffening.

“N-Naruto, what are you doing up so early?” He asked as he leaned down to untie his shoes. Naruto caught the wince as Lee bent down. He blinked as his jaw dropped. He knew that kind of wince and it wasn’t one he’d thought he’d ever see Lee with.

“There’s a girl here for you.” Naruto managed to say, biting his tongue as he pointed towards the kitchen. “She says she’s a friend of Gaara’s” Lee bit his lip, the skin already broken and scabbed from abuse. Lee ran a hand through his unnaturally messy hair as he sighed.

“I do not really want to see anyone right no-.” Lee started just as Hakuto entered the living room. Lee froze as he met the girl’s eyes, hands curling into fists at his side. The pain beat heavily in his chest as he looked at the girl who had taken Gaara from him.

She had kind eyes, eyes that reminded him of Gaara’s when she blinked up at him. She smiled at him gently as she approached him.

“You must be Lee, I’m-.” She started only to have Lee turn away and walk towards the hall.

“I know who you are.” Lee said bitterly, a tone filled with anger that Naruto hadn’t heard in Lee’s voice in a long time. “I do not know why you are here but please leave.” Hakuto blinked as Kakashi and Gai entered.

Gai’s eyes furrowed in surprise at Lee’s tone, exchanging a look with Kakashi.

“Lee.” Gai scolded when Kakashi laid a hand on his shoulder. Kakashi glanced at Lee, disappointment and sadness heavy in his gaze as he took in Lee’s slumped stance. He knew this look, eyes heavy with regret and lack of sleep with clothes wrinkled from being thrown on haphazardly in an attempt to run.

Lee had slept with someone, Kakashi could only guess it had been Shira but something was wrong. Lee carried himself with a heaviness that seemed to weigh down his entire being. Lee was hurting and Kakashi was unable to provide comfort with Hakuto present.

“I know I’m probably the last person you want to see but this is important.” Hakuto insisted, steeling her nerves as she took a breath. “I came to explain things for Gaara. He refuses to do it himself but he needs you.” Lee blinked, turning back to Hakuto with narrowed eyes.

“What do you mean, he has you and he has clearly moved on from me.” Lee said as he glared at the girl. He was too tired to deal with this, he didn’t need more heartache. Hakuto grabbed his sleeve as Lee tried to walk away.

“My mother blackmailed Gaara into dating me, he never wanted to.” Hakuto blurted out, her cheeks flushing in her desperation. “He thinks that it’s better this way, that if you deserve better, but he loves you and he’s the one hurting.” She needed to do this for Gaara, he had been too kind to her for her to leave him without knowing he would be happy.

Lee blinked slowly, turning to the woman as his eyes widened at her. His heart ached in his chest as he thought of Gaara. Why had Gaara chosen to ignore him if he still wanted him, why had Gaara pushed him away after Lee tried to mend things?

“If he loves me so much, then why did he not tell me even once?” Lee said, squeezing the bridge of his nose in his frustration. “Why did he ignore me when I tried to speak to him about the fight?” Hakuto sighed, wrapping her arms around her body.

“Because he thought you’d be better off with someone who could love you openly,” She said softly. “With my mother blackmailing him and his hold on the company skating on pleasing the board members…he knew coming out would result in thousands of workers would be laid off because he wouldn’t be able to take control. He loves you but he couldn’t forsake thousands of families.” Hakuto looked up at Lee as his breath hitched, eyes wide as he stared at her.

Naruto took that moment to speak up.

“So Gaara told you all this?” Naruto asked, crossing his arms as he raised a brow at the woman. Kakashi turned to her, wanting to know the answer to that question as well. Gaara had caused his son a lot of heartache, why would he have told this girl but not Lee. Hakuto sighed again.

“He told me some things but you can see it if you know how to look,” Hakuto said, playing with the ring on her left hand. “He doesn’t sleep, barely eats, he wouldn’t even kiss me until my mother demanded it of him. I didn’t realize until last night when I figured out that he still wears Lee’s shirt when he’s resting. He doesn’t take it off when he’s in his home.”

Lee could feel his heart drop into his stomach. He vaguely remembered hearing Hakuto say the same thing the night before but he hadn’t been listening. He had been too consumed by his own hurt, his own emotions to realize what the woman had been telling him.

Gaara was still clinging to pieces that Lee had left behind, still loving him and suffering in silence. Lee should have seen the signs, should have sensed that Gaara was doing what he always had done when faced with overwhelming emotions.

Tried to face them alone.

Lee’s breathing increased as his thoughts raced. He had given up on Gaara, convinced himself that the red head was a lost cause. Guilt ate at Lee’s heart as he remembered his night with Shira and a wave of nausea washed over him. It wasn’t Lee that deserved better than Gaara.

It was Gaara that needed better than him.

Tears burned at Lee’s eyes as Hakuto stared up at him. Her soft blue eyes searching his for something as she opened her mouth to speak again, releasing his sleeve.

“If you ever felt anything close to love for Gaara then please, go make amends with him.” Hakuto pleaded as Naruto moved toward Lee as his hand went up to his mouth. Lee shook his head, wrapping his other arm around himself.

“H-he will not want me now.” Lee choked as his nausea finally got the better of him. He sped down the hall to the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind him as he just barely made it to the toilet to vomit up the contents of his near empty stomach.

He had betrayed Gaara the moment he’d agreed to sleep with Shira, he moment he had let the other man kiss him. Lee cried as his throat burned, tears tracking down his cheeks. Gaara would not want him after this. Who would want someone who claimed to love them but let another have their way with them?

Lee certainly hadn’t given taking Gaara back any thought after he thought he was with Hakuto, had slept with Hakuto. Why would Gaara want that constant reminder of Lee’s disloyalty nagging at the back of his mind whenever they were together? Lee vomited again, gripping the rim of the toilet as he let his shame flow down his cheeks.

* * *

Hakuto had left by the time Lee finally trudged out of the bathroom and walked into his room. He collapsed onto the bed, too exhausted to do much else other than sleep.

He curled up on his bed, drawing a pillow to his chest as he hugged it close. He felt cold and numb.

He sighed as he thought of Gaara, wishing that he had never started that stupid fight and had never let Shira into his life. Lee wanted to take everything back from the past nine months. He would give anything if Gaara was in his arms right now.

But Lee had made his decisions and now he had to live with them.

Lee sighed as he tried to sleep when there was a soft knock at his door. Lee didn’t have to look up to know who it was.

“Bushy brows,” Naruto said softly as he entered the room. Lee didn’t bother looking up as he felt the weight shift on his bed. “Come on buddy, talk to me.” Lee sighed as he looked at the wall.

“I do not want to go see Gaara, Naruto.” Lee stated as he held the pillow tighter against his chest, knowing what his friend was going to ask him to do. “Nothing you say is going to change my mind.” Naruto scowled, irritation getting the better of him.

This wasn’t like Lee. Lee never let anything stop him when he had a goal in mind. Naruto had no idea what had happened the night before with Shira but this shell of a man that lay on the bed was not his friend. Lee had never looked so broken and Naruto struggled to find a way to light the fire in his friend’s eyes.

“Well you can’t just lay here being miserable!” Naruto stated as he moved to touch Lee’s shoulder. “Gaara is waiting in Suna and you need to…” Lee shook his head, curling into himself even further. He just wanted to be left alone.

“No, I betrayed Gaara the minute I let Shira…” Lee stopped himself, not wanting to talk to Naruto about what he had down. Naruto would not judge him but there were some things Lee didn’t want to share. Naruto’s eyes widened as he let his hand fall away from Lee, clenching his fists in his lap.

“Just leave me alone Naruto,” Lee said as he buried his face in his pillow. “For once in your life, just stop trying to interfere.” Naruto rose from his spot on the bed, clenching his jaw as he shook in anger.

“Fine, just lay here and give up.” Naruto snapped as he turned toward the door. If Lee wasn’t going to fix this himself, than Naruto was going to fix it for him. He stomped down the hallway and grabbed the keys to the van that lay in the dish by the front door.

The door opened and shut with a heavy slam as Naruto walked out to the van and got into it. As he pulled out of the drive and headed toward the highway, Naruto’s rage gathered in his belly.

He had a few choice words for a certain red head.

* * *

 

Lee sighed as he heard the van in the driveway sputter to life, not caring what Naruto was doing as he rolled over. It didn’t matter what the blond tried, there was no fixing this mistake.

The door to his bedroom opened with a creak and the sound of long nails on the hardwood floor. Lee looked up to see the dogs walking into the room, followed closely by his fathers’. Lee sighed as Ūhei, Shiba, Bisuke, Uhashi, Guruko, Akino and Pakkun leapt onto the bed to find various places to lay amongst Lee’s legs as Bull plopped down onto the area in front of the bed.

“Lee, are you okay?” Gai asked as he wheeled beside the bed, taking care to mind Bull’s resting form. Kakashi took a seat between Akino and Guruko to gently rub Lee’s back. Lee felt the lump in his throat rise again and he felt tears prick his eyes.

“I am just tired.” Lee lied, biting his sore lip. He didn’t want to talk to anyone about what had happened, how he was feeling right now but his fathers’ were definitely the last people he wanted to tell about the previous night. Kakashi sighed heavily.

“You slept with Shira last night, didn’t you Lee?” Kakashi said softly and Lee stiffened, sitting up quickly. A jolt of pain shot up his back and Lee winced. Kakashi let out another sigh as Lee lowered his eyes as he opened his mouth to deny Kakashi’s guess.

“Lee, don’t lie you’re not good at it.” Kakashi stated as his son sat up, crossing his legs in front of him. Lee sighed heavily as Pakkun curled in his lap.

“I-I accidentally angered Shira last night, after everyone went to bed…He told me that I needed to make a decision between him and Gaara. So I went to him late last night and we…did it.” Lee explained, feeling uncomfortable as he remembered the night before. “I did not…it felt so wrong but I did it anyway…now I just feel so…So…” Tears fell down his cheeks as Kakashi put a hand on his knee.

“Empty and used.” Kakashi stated as Gai looked up at him, eyes sad. “I know the feeling Lee.” Lee nodded as he sobbed, tears falling onto Pakkun’s back. The dog looked up and whined.

“I was very uncomfortable the whole time but I still let it happen and now, knowing that Gaara still loves me and knowing that I betrayed him like that…It hurts so much Dad.” Lee said as Gai pulled himself up on the bed. “I do not know what to do.” Gai’s face darkened as he gently ran his hands over Lee’s hair, smoothing it down.

“Do you love Shira?” Gai asked. Lee looked up and met his father’s eyes in surprise. He bit his lip and shook his head.

“After last night, I am not even sure if I ever even liked him at all.” Lee admitted, voice heavy with regret. “I thought I would after last night but now I am even surer that I do not.” Gai nodded in understanding, steeling his gaze.

“Then you need to get up and stop feeling sorry for yourself.” Gai implored, Kakashi looked at him with furrowed brows. Gai’s tone was anything but sympathetic and Kakashi was surprised that his normally kind partner wasn’t being so.

“Lee, you have to tell Shira how you truly feel.” Gai explained, his eyes never leaving his son’s. “You cannot base a relationship off of lies and if you do not wish to be with him any longer, you must tell him.” Lee’s eyebrows furrowed as he looked up with a confused expression.

“But shouldn’t I at least try?” Lee questioned, remembering how hard Gai had worked to be with Kakashi. Love was never easy but shouldn’t he work to love a man who wouldn’t push him away and hurt him, no matter how unintentional?

“Even if Gaara still wants to be with me, he pushed me away. Again! I thought we had gotten past that point. Why should I not try to make it work with Shira, who is here and does not do those things with me?” Lee continued, raising his brow at his father. Gai shook his head sadly.

“I am not saying that you have to make up with Gaara, that you need to leave Shira because of that but if being with this man makes you this miserable than it is time to let him go. You deserve to be happy and so does he. Pretending to be happy with him will only make more heartache for you both in the end.” Gai continued. “And if you ever have to force yourself to have sex with anyone, if that person ever makes you feel like you have to in order to be with them, then they are not the person for you.” Kakashi nodded and reached over to take Gai’s hand.

Lee thought about it as the silence stretched on, thinking heavily on what his father had said. Gai’s words always had a habit of leading Lee back into reality. It was as if he father always knew exactly what to say to make Lee see the situation with more clarity.

It had always been that way really. Just as Lee felt he was getting lost in the swirl of problems that made up life, Gai always managed to say just what Lee needed to hear. Even if it wasn’t always what Lee wanted to hear, Gai knew exactly what Lee needed to be told. His father’s words had always saved him back in his younger days and here it was again, saving him now.  

Lee bit his lip, ignoring the pain as he soaked in Gai’s words. If being with Shira made him unhappy, then he should end things. He couldn’t just sit here, feeling sorry for himself. Lee needed to do something about his problem, even if it was hard. Kakashi gently laid his hand over Lee’s as it absentmindedly petted Pakkun.

“Take it from me Lee, there is no use in dwelling on past mistakes. The past is the past and you can’t change that. What matters now is making the right decision now and moving forward.” Kakashi said as Gai squeezed his hand in comfort.

Lee nodded, taking another moment to think on it. He knew it would be hard to break things off with Shira but did he really want to spend the rest of his life with someone he didn’t feel comfortable with? He already felt unbearable loneliness after the night before and the thought of having to pretend to love Shira just made the resentment curl in his heart. It wasn’t fair to Shira, it wasn’t fair to Lee.  

He knew what he needed to do now.

“I-I think I need to talk to Shira.” Lee said finally, rising from his bed to fetch his cell phone. Gai nodded and smiled, getting back into his chair with practiced ease. Kakashi rose as well as Lee pulled his fathers into a hug.

“Thank you.” Lee said gratefully as he released his fathers’ and headed for the door. “I think I know what I have to do now.” Gai nodded as he rolled up next to Kakashi, letting the man put a hand on his shoulder as they watched their son leave. The door slammed in the familiar way Lee did and Kakashi chuckled.

“Well you sure know how to light a fire under his ass.” Kakashi commented as Gai raised his hand to take his. “But at least he isn’t laying around in a depression anymore.” Gai nodded, chuckling as he angled the chair to pull Kakashi onto his lap.

“He just needed to be reminded that Maito men don’t give up.” Gai said solemnly as Kakashi settled onto his lap, wrapping his arms around Gai’s neck and giving Gai a wistful look. Gai wrinkled his brow at his lover.

“What is it Kakashi?” Gai asked, wheeling them out of Lee’s room and towards the kitchen. Kakashi cupped Gai’s cheek and stroking it as he gazed into the man’s eyes.

“I’m just remembering what my life was like before you.” Kakashi said with a sigh. “Sleeping around and taking my pleasure whenever I wanted.” Gai wrapped his arms around Kakashi’s waist, eyes searching his lover’s in question.

“Do you miss it?” Gai asked with a raised brow. Kakashi chuckled and ran his fingers through Gai’s soft black hair, pressing his forehead to Gai’s.

“It was a short term pleasure.” Kakashi stated as Gai closed his eyes with a sigh of content. “Being with you is a long term happiness that I’m not quite ready to give up on.” Gai smiled up at his lover as he pulled away.

“I love you Kakashi.” Gai said as Kakashi gazed down at Gai for a moment before he pulled his mask down and kissed Gai deeply.

Gai murmured as he settled into the kiss, smiling as Kakashi pulled away. Kakashi straddled the chair and gently nip at Gai’s ear. The man gasped and looked up at his partner. Kakashi smirked at him.

“Since the kids are out, how about I show you just how much I love you.” Kakashi purred as he resumed suckling on Gai’s neck. Gai gasped as Kakashi ran his hand up his shirt, brushing a rough thumb over his nipple. Gai chuckled, moving his hands down to grab Kakashi’s ass.

“It has been awhile since we’ve been able to make love in the kitchen.” Gai said with a teasing grin and Kakashi raised a brow, smiling at his lover.

“When did you become such a pervert?” Kakashi asked as Gai leaned up to kiss him again. Gai sighed happily and squeezed Kakashi’s ass beneath his hands.

“When I began dating you.” Gai teased before their lips met again in another heated kiss.

* * *

 

Gaara sighed as he walked into his apartment, massaging his temple after his hectic day. He had successfully had Tojuro arrested for laundering money from the company and that had effectively gotten the board members to except his leadership. He had been feeling good after that small victory.

Until he heard the news about Hakuto.

The woman had run off into the night, eloped with Shigezane and left without a trace. Gaara was a mixture of relieved and sad. He was glad Hakuto had taken her happiness, decided to escape her mother’s grasp in favor of marrying the man she loved.

Now if only he could do the same.

Now that he was free from the grasps of his forced relationship, Gaara was conflicted. He could possibly try to win Lee back, go to the man he loved and try to mend things. But as much as his heart cried for Lee’s presence, he knew it couldn’t mend what he had done. He had no idea what he could say to make up for his actions.

Gaara was alone in the house as he went back to his room. He had a final to study for his economics class as well as a pile of paperwork that needed to be done. He walked to his bed, tossing off his dress shirt and reaching for the familiar softness of Lee’s shirt. He pulled it to his nose, inhaling the soft scent that still clung to the threads.

His heart ached as he walked to his desk and sat down, gathering his book and notes to start studying. Just as he opened to the page he needed, there was a heavy pounding on the door. He rose with a sigh as he walked to the door. Who could be bothering him in the middle of the evening?

He unlocked the door, not bothering to check the peephole to see who it was. He opened it and looked up just in time to receive a punch to his face. Gaara stumbled back, holding his aching jaw as he looked up.

Naruto pushed his way into the apartment, chest heaving in his anger. His blue eyes blazed as he threw another punch. Gaara dodged, backing up into the living room as the door slammed shut.

“You and I need to have some words!” Naruto growled as he reached to grab Gaara by the shirt. “What the hell do you think you’re doing to Lee?!” Gaara blinked up at Naruto, still in shock that his friend was even here.

“I’d say you still hit like a girl but even Hinata hits harder than that.” Gaara quipped as Naruto glared down at him, free hand clenched in a fist at his side. “What are you doing here Naruto?” Teal eyes met angry blue as Naruto growled.

“I’m here because Lee refuses to be!” Naruto spat, clenching the shirt tighter in his fist. “Because you’re both being idiots and frankly I’m sick and tired of seeing it.” Naruto dragged Gaara to the couch, pushing him into the seat and jabbing his fingers as the red head opened his mouth to speak.

“You are going to shut up and listen to what I have to say.” Naruto snapped, warning tone making Gaara shut his mouth as he continued to stare at his friend. Naruto hadn’t been this angry with him since back before he dated Lee, when the he and the blond had destroyed a diner fighting about how deeply Gaara had hurt Lee.

“I see what you’re doing here, your pulling the same crap you always do.” Naruto shouted, throwing his arms up into the air. “You pushed Lee away after you guys fought, shoved him aside with some shitty notion that it was better for him. How many times do I have to kick your ass before you learn that isn’t how you deal with problems?!” Gaara looked up at Naruto, eyes narrowed.

“I had no choice, I was being…” Gaara started to say when Naruto interrupted him, his own eyes narrowing as he pointed at Gaara.

“You were being blackmailed into dating that Hakuto girl by her bitch of a mother and the board members were breathing down your neck to date some women.” Naruto growled, taking in Gaara’s confused expression. “She came to the house this morning and told us everything. How could you even think for a second that keeping Lee away was the right way to deal with that? When you love someone, you have to talk to them about your problems!”

Gaara sighed, putting his hand on his chin and working his sore jaw before he spoke again.

“It wouldn’t have been fair to Lee for me to pretend to date a woman while staying with him. He deserves someone who can love him openly and I couldn’t afford to let thousands of families lose their jobs if I came out in public.” Gaara said, not meeting Naruto’s eyes as he stared at his feet. “There was no use fighting what was happening, there was nothing I could do about it.” Naruto scoffed, his tone mocking as he gave a bitter laugh.

“I guess Lee was right,” Naruto said, voice lowering as he shook his head in disbelief and turned towards the door. “You don’t love him.” Suddenly, there was a flash of red and Naruto found himself hissing as he was slammed against the wall. Pictures rattled, falling off the wall with a tinkle of glass as Gaara pinned him to it.

A fire was lit in Gaara’s eyes, an anger Naruto hadn’t seen since the days before he had become his friend. Gaara’s hands gripped Naruto’s shirt as he pressed him into the wall.

“Don’t ever say I don’t love Lee!” Gaara growled, the normally passive teal eyes raging with pain and loneliness that made Naruto’s eyes widen. “I did what I had to do to protect his happiness. All I have ever wanted was to make Lee happy but how could Lee be happy with someone like me!? Someone who makes him cry, who treated his love like a burden and couldn’t let go of his past enough to trust his boyfriend not to hurt him?” Naruto’s eyes widened at Gaara’s grip tightened around his shirt as Gaara’s eyes welled with tears. He heart hurt so much, it threatened to break him from the inside out. Naruto grasped Gaara’s wrists as his hands started to shake.

“Yes, I miss him. God, I miss him so much but Lee left me and I let him walk away. Lee will be so much happier when he finds someone else.” Gaara said, breathing heavily as he slowly released Naruto’s shirt. “I destroy everything I touch and it’s better that Lee left while he still could.” Suddenly, warm arms wrapped around Gaara’s shoulders as Naruto hugged him.

“Gaara, you’ve gotten so much better over the years. I watched you go from an angry nutcase who heard voices, to the owner of one of the largest companies in Suna but you’re regressing for some reason.” Naruto stated as he felt warm tears fall onto his shirt as Gaara sobbed into his shoulder “The Gaara I know would never let anyone tell him who to be or who to love. In fact, the Gaara I know actually told a teacher off for refusing to let him come into the homecoming dance holding hands with his boyfriend.”

Gaara gave a water logged chuckle, having cried wet spots onto Naruto’s shoulder, heart wrenching painfully in his chest as nearly nine months of pain was released from his body. He didn’t know why but Naruto’s words were slowly making him realize just how much of his life he had let other’s dictate lately.

“I came because Lee misses you just as much as you miss him.” Naruto said, his eyes clouded with worry. “When I left he was curled on his bed just staring off into space. He still wants you but he’s convinced himself that you don’t want him. I can see the loneliness in his eyes, the hurt. If you are okay with other people forcing you into an unhappy life that’s fine but I can’t let you do this to Lee anymore. It’s tearing him apart.”  

Gaara looked up, eyes widening in shock. He would have thought Lee had moved on by now, had gotten over their relationship and healed. But Lee was hurting and thinking it was because Gaara didn’t want him anymore. He had never meant for Lee to blame himself but to blame Gaara for the hurt. He should have known better, Lee always put others before himself, blamed himself for anything done to him.

God, how could he be so stupid?

“I need to see him, I need to explain this.” Gaara said as he rose to his feet and walked to his room to put on a pair of pants. “You’re right Naruto, I need to stop this. I’ve been selfish and it wasn’t fair to Lee. I just hope he forgives me.” Naruto’s eyes softened at his friend as he grabbed his keys.

“I knew punching you would knock some sense into that head of yours.” Naruto said with a smile as Gaara walked back into the living room just as there was another knock at the door. Gaara walked over to answer it.

Mrs. Hōki stood at the door, clearly flustered and disheveled. She entered the apartment without asking and looked at the broken pictures before giving Naruto a once over.

“Another of your lovers I assume?” She sneered before turning back to Gaara. The red head looked at her with an angry glare, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“What do you want?” Gaara stated, his tone sounding suspicious. “Hakuto is gone, you have no more business with me.” Mrs. Hōki chuckled as Naruto glared at the woman.

“If you think that’s going to stop me then you’re mistaken.” She said with a smirk. “If you want this kept hidden then you will do whatever I tell you. I suggest we merge the companies or I will have that photo published in all the tabloids…” Naruto sprinted to Gaara’s side, anger flaring once more.

“Look here you fucking bi-.” He started to shout when Gaara held up his hand, eyes meeting Mrs. Hōki’s with a stubborn glare.

“Do it then, I refuse to be your plaything any longer.” Gaara stated then picked up his phone and dialed a number. The phone rang for a few moments and the other end picked up.

“What do you want Gaara,” Shikamaru stated through the phone. “I was napping…” Gaara’s eyes did not leave the woman in front of him.

“Do you still have the copy of the black mail photo?” He stated as Mrs. Hōki’s eyes widened in shock. Shikamaru grunted as the sound of shuffling papers crinkled on the phone.

“Yeah, is that troublesome woman there to collect?” Shikamaru guessed, a smirk clear in his voice. Gaara sighed.

“Yes, you can send it to the reporters now along with the email for the interviews.” Gaara said, sounding cool and collected. He was finished hiding, it was time to implement the next phase of Shikamaru’s plan. “Tell them I’ll meet with them next week to discuss the details.” Mrs. Hōki’s eye snapped open as her jaw dropped.

“Wait, what do you think you’re doing?” She screeched, making a dive for the phone and ending up being blocked by Naruto’s tall torso. The blond glared down at the woman. Gaara turned his attention back to Mrs. Hōki.

“What I should have done nine months ago.” Gaara commented as he turned his attention back to his call. Shikamaru made a small, smug noise as he clicked away at his keyboard.  

“Just hit send, good luck with that troublesome woman.” Shikamaru stated. “Dealing with her is going to be such a drag.” Gaara shook his head as the phone went dead. Mrs. Hōki glared at him, mouth ajar in her surprise as she sputtered angrily.

“You…You ungrateful brat!” She shouted as Naruto shared a smirk with Gaara. The woman turned to the door and left, slamming it as she shouted. “You’re the one who told Hakuto she could leave…Y-you put some silly fantasy about true love in her mind and took her out of my control. Just you wait, this isn’t the last you’ll see of me, you filthy faggot. I will have my revenge.”

The woman smirked, eyes narrowing at the red head as she pointed her finger at Gaara’s chest.

“Maybe I’ll just send someone to your little boyfriend to have a nice little chat.” She threatened, losing her temper at the sudden loss of control. “Rock Lee wasn’t it?” Gaara chuckled, smiling as his hand went to his pocket. He drew out a small tape recorder and pressed the button. Mrs. Hōki’s voice sounded over the recording. The woman’s eyes widened, fear setting into them.

“Doesn’t that sound like a threat to you Naruto?” Gaara asked his friend as he turned to him. “And I bet my best friend will make a great witness.” Naruto let out a laugh and glared at Mrs. Hōki.

“Yeah it does, I bet the tabloids and the police will have a field day with this.” He said as the woman backed away, eyes the size of saucers as she looked back and forth between the men.

“You wouldn’t dare.” She growled, her voice shaking in fear. This could ruin her reputation, her husband’s reputation let alone get her in serious legal trouble. “You can’t it will ruin me!” Gaara glared at her, smile turning into a fine line.

“Then you will leave my home and never contact me or Hakuto again.” Gaara said with finality, pocketing the device. “Or I will make good on my threat.” The woman nodded in defeat, turning to the door quickly as she clenched her fists at her side. The door slammed, shaking the walls as the woman left. Naruto put his hand on Gaara’s shoulder, smirking at the man.

“Come on, buddy.” The blond stated, twirling his key ring on his forefinger. “Let’s go get your man back.”

* * *

 

Lee stared out at pond from his spot on the bench in the park. He watched the ducks play in the water, smiling as they came up to eat the bits of frozen peas Lee had gotten to throw them.

Watching the ducks, Lee tried to calm his frazzled nerves. He had hoped meeting Shira in a public place might make what he had to do easier but the nervousness in his gut didn’t untwist.

How would Shira react to this, how would he take breaking up? Lee let out a heavy sigh as he stared at the pond. His thoughts floated to Gaara and tears pricked his eyes.

He wondered if he should contact the man or if it would be best to simply let Gaara keep believing that he had moved on. Lee moved his collar higher, trying to hide the bruises and hickeys that decorated his neck. They were marks from a night full of regrets and lies, marks that showed his disloyalty and gave ownership of his body to another.

“What are you thinking about so heavily?” Shira’s voice said teasingly, sliding onto the bench next to Lee. Lee started, drawn from his thoughts as he looked up at Shira. The handsome man draped his arm over the back of the bench.

“N-nothing just thinking about a few things.” Lee said nervously as Shira raised a brow and smirked at Lee. Shira’s hand reached for Lee’s thigh as he reached over to pull down Lee’s collar, smiling at his handiwork.

“I’m glad you called, I felt bad that I couldn’t make you breakfast before you left.” Shira commented as he moved closer, guiding Lee’s mouth up for a kiss. “I had so much fun last night, we should do it again sometime.” Lee turned his head away just as Shira’s lips almost met his. He could do this, he needed to do this.

Shira raised a brow as he pulled away from Lee, searching the man’s face for some kind of indicator of his thoughts. He reached for Lee’s hand only to have Lee pull it away. Lee took a deep breath, clenching his fists on his knees.

“Lee, what’s wrong?” Shira asked, looking his boyfriend over. “Did something happen?” Lee shook his head, turning to Shira to meet his eyes with his own. He steeled his resolve as he finally opened his mouth.

“Shira, I cannot do this anymore.” Lee said, watching as Shira’s eyes widened in surprise. “I want to break up.” Shira searched Lee’s face, shaking his head as he tried to find some kind of indicator of why this was happening.

“What?” Shira stated as he rose from his spot on the bench to stare down at Lee. “Where is this coming from, Lee?” Lee rose, biting his lip as he fought to keep Shira’s gaze. He wasn’t running anymore.

“I am not happy like this, with you.” Lee explained, feeling guilt eat at his heart when a look of hurt passed over Shira’s expression. “I cannot keep pretending that I want to stay with you, pretending that I enjoy when you touch me…” Shira shook his head in disbelief.

“B-but last night, we had sex and you...you came to me Lee.” Shira said, voice growing a little angrier. “You said you wanted me to…” Lee nodded and sighed, tears gathering in his eyes.

“I know what I said but I was trying to move on, force myself to stay with you because I thought it was the right thing to do.” Lee explained as he looked out towards the pond, not meeting Shira’s eyes. “But it feels so wrong…” Shira shook his head in disbelief, trying to understand what Lee was saying.

“Can’t we talk about this?” Shira asked hopefully. “Maybe it’s something we can overcome.” Lee shook his head, eyes sad as he shuffled his feet and bit his lip again. He hated doing this. Shira had been so kind and understanding to him, he hated hurting him this way.

 “I understand if you are angry and you have every right to be but…” Lee struggled to find the words to ease the pain in Shira’s eyes. “I cannot change the way I feel and it is not fair to you for me to pretend that I love you when I do not. I am sorry.” Shira scoffed, stepping forward to grab Lee’s arm.

“Is it something I did?” Shira asked gripping Lee’s arm. Lee winced slightly, the grip too tight on his arm. He looked from the hand to Shira.

“No, it is entirely my fault.” Lee comforted, trying to pull his arm from Shira’s grip as it tightened further. “Shira please let go, that hurts.” Shira shook his head, not loosening his hold.

“Not until you tell me why you’re breaking up with me.” Shira stated pulling Lee to him. “If it’s because of last night, give it some time. The first time is never the easiest but I’m sure if we-.” Lee shook his head, fighting to get out of Shira’s grip on his arm.

“Please Shira, do not make this more difficult than it already is.” Lee begged, tears pricking at his eyes. The grip was bruising now as he tried to wiggle free. “Please let go of me.”

Suddenly, someone pushed past Lee. A pale hand grabbed Shira’s wrist and wrenched it off of Lee’s arm. Lee’s eyes widened as Gaara stepped in front of him, glaring at Shira with pure anger in his eyes.

“Don’t touch him again.” Gaara warned, eyes narrowed as Lee took a step back. “Or you will regret it.” Shira squared his shoulders as he looked down at the smaller man.

“Mr. No Subaku, what are you doing here?” Shira asked incredulously, raising his brow in question as Lee stared at the red head’s back. The dark brown eyes were widened in surprise as he brought his hands up to his arms.

“Gaara…why are you here?” Lee asked when Naruto came up next to him. The blond glared at Shira, turning to Lee. Lee sighed, he should have guessed Naruto would have gone to Gaara.

“You okay bushy brows?” Naruto said, concern in his eyes as he tossed a glare at Shira. Lee nodded as Shira scoffed, anger growing in his stance as he wrenched his wrist from Gaara’s grasp.

“Gaara…So you’re the infamous ex-boyfriend.” Shira growled, looking past Gaara to glare at Lee. “So this is why you’re breaking up with me, for him?” Shira’s voice dripped with venom as Lee sighed again.

“No Shira, I did not even know he was-.” Lee started to say. Shira shook his head.

“I didn’t think you’d be this stupid Lee.” Shira shouted, drawing attention from the other park goers. “After everything he put you through, you’re just going to crawl back to him?” Gaara glared at the man.

“What goes on between Lee and I is our business.” Gaara stated, giving Shira a once over. “Why don’t you leave now? I don’t like the way you’re speaking to him.” Shira turned to Gaara, glaring at Gaara with a look of complete hatred.

“How dare you come back here and think everything will just be okay?” Shira stated, getting in Gaara’s face with a smirk. “I bet he didn’t tell you about all the fun we had last night.” Lee froze, shaking his head as he moved toward Shira.

“Shira, please do not…” Lee started as Shira laughed bitterly. Gaara’s eyes narrowed at the man as he continued, body stiffening as he realized what Shira was implying.

“I was right,” Shira sneered, casting a glance at Lee. “Did he tell you how he came to me? He was practically begging for me to fuck him and boy, was it fun. He was just perfect, laying there while I marked every inch of him.” Gaara’s eyes widened as he turned to Lee slowly, eyes searching his with hurt rising to the surface. Lee bit his lip, tears tracking down his cheeks as Naruto moved to stand next to Gaara.

“Hey asshole, shut the fuck up!” Naruto shouted as Gaara turned back to him. Shira chuckled, voice bitter as he looked Lee in the eye. He didn’t care about Lee’s feelings right now, he was too consumed by his own hurt.

“Don’t act so hurt,” Shira mocked Lee as he put his hand to his mouth, shaking his head and looking at the ground. “Why don’t you tell him about how you cried out for me like a little bi-?”

Naruto moved in a blur of motion, fist connecting with Shira’s nose. The man stumbled back, holding his bleeding nose as he looked up at Naruto. The blond’s eyes narrowed at the man as he gritted his teeth.

“Don’t ever talk about Lee like that!” Naruto shouted, yanking Shira to his feet by his collar as the man stared at him in a daze. Lee dove forward, taking Naruto’s grip off of Shira’s collar.

“Naruto, let me handle this!” Lee snapped, pointing off into the distance, glaring at his friend. “Just go, I will talk to both of you later.” Naruto’s eyes snapped between Lee and Shira before scowling at Shira.

“You so much as look at him wrong and I will kick your ass.” Naruto threatened before turning and walking off with Gaara. Gaara stared at Lee the whole time he walked away, teal eyes looking lost and hurt. Lee let out a heavy sigh as he turned to Shira.

“I am sorry Shira.” Lee said softly, stepping forward to clean Shira’s nose with his jacket sleeve.  “Naruto can be very protective.” Shira nodded, shaking his head as his shoulders slumped slightly.

“No, I deserved it.” Shira stated, looking down at the dried tear stains on Lee’s cheeks. He hadn’t meant to hurt the man. “I shouldn’t have said anything about last night. It wasn’t right.” Lee nodded as he took a step back, shuffling his feet around in the dirt.

Shira stared off into the distance, glancing at Gaara as Naruto talked to him. The blond placed a hand on Gaara’s shoulder as the red head stared at Lee’s back. Shira’s heart gave a small jolt of pain as he took in the look of hurt and desperation in Gaara’s gaze. Shira remembered that feeling from his own first love.

The feeling of making a mistake, regretting it and trying to fix it. Now that his head was clear, he could tell that the red headed man was trying to fix what he had broken. Shira looked back at Lee with a heavy sigh of his own.

“I’m sorry for how I acted.” Shira said, meeting Lee’s eyes sadly. “If you’re uncomfortable and don’t want to be with me anymore, then I should accept your wishes like a man.” Lee smiled in relief, glad that the man was finally understanding.

“Thank you Shira.” Lee said gratefully, the spark of life returning to his eyes as Shira glanced over his shoulder again.

“Are you going to take him back?” Shira asked Lee, not taking his eyes off Gaara as the red head glared at him fiercely. Lee sighed, putting his hands in his pockets as he looked back at Gaara. Shira caught the softness in the dark-haired man’s gaze as he looked Gaara over.

“I do not know yet.” Lee said softly, tears clouding his vision again. “I still love him but after all this…after all the hurt we put each other through…what if he does not change? What if he does not want me back now?” there were so many questions running through Lee’s mind, threatening to consume him.

Shira nodded, looking back down at Lee after tearing his eyes away from Gaara. The red head had done nothing but stare at Lee, eyes full of love, hurt and confusion. It was easy to see that Gaara loved Lee, it was plain to see from the hurt in his eyes when Shira had shouted about their evening together.

“He keeps looking at you and it’s easy to see that he adores you.” Shira comforted, putting a hand on Lee’s shoulder. “I think that you two should talk, open and honestly about your relationship. Tell him how much he hurt you, tell him how you felt when he ignored you. The best way to mend this is to be honest and sincere. He needs to realize he won’t get another second chance if you choose to give him one. And if you don’t, that’s your prerogative.”

Lee nodded, grateful for the advice. Shira smiled at him, glancing at Gaara for another moment before turning back to Lee.

“I’ll go and let you guys talk…if you ever change your mind, feel free to look me up.” Shira said as he leaned forward slightly. “One more kiss before I go?” Lee hesitated for a moment, glancing at Gaara then sighing.

“Okay but be qui-.” Lee was cut off by Shira’s lips on his own. Shira pulled away after a moment, raising his brow at Lee.

“Nothing?” Shira asked and Lee shook his head. No butterflies, no feelings. Kissing Shira had left Lee with no racing heartbeat. He felt nothing.

“No, I am sorry.” Lee said with a sad smile as Shira shrugged, his own easy smile gracing his lips again.

“Can’t blame a guy for trying.” Shira joked as he walked past Lee. As he walked by Gaara, he looked at the man with a fierce glare. He raised his hand, placing it firmly on Gaara’s shoulder.

“Don’t hurt him again.” Shira stated, “If he does give you a second chance, don’t you dare take it for granted. He’s too good for someone like you.” Shira glared one more time before turning and giving Naruto a curt nod, taking his leave. The blond blinked as the man left, surprised by the comment. Maybe Shira wasn’t so bad of a guy.

Lee walked up to Gaara and Naruto, staring at Gaara with tired eyes. The red head looked up at Lee, standing awkwardly as the man he loved stood just a few feet from him. His heart ached as he lifted a hand to touch Lee.

“Lee, I…” Gaara started to say but Lee took a step back, evading Gaara’s touch. Gaara felt his heart ache hollowly as Lee turned to Naruto.

“Naruto, can you give me and Gaara a minute?” He asked, turning back to Gaara with fierce eyes. “We need to talk about some things.” Naruto nodded, squeezing Gaara’s shoulder as he walked past him. The blond offered Gaara an encouraging smile before he finished walking towards his car.

Gaara turned to Lee, scanning the man with his eyes. Gaara had not seen him in months but he could see the toll that the stress had been putting on the Lee. His normally shiny, well-kept hair was in disarray, his clothes wrinkled. The eyes Gaara had always known to be so full of life and confidence, looked tired and sad.

Gaara’s throat caught, guilt eating at his soul as he realized that this was his fault. He had hurt Lee on a much deeper level than he had intended.

“Why are you here Gaara?” Lee asked, not looking at the man as he shuffled his feet in the dirt. Gaara blinked, taking a step towards Lee as he tried to find the words to convey the guilt in his chest.

“I missed you and came to talk to you.” Gaara started, wishing Lee would look at him. “I hadn’t realized that you had…moved on.” Lee looked up at him, hands in his pockets. Lee shook his head, looking down at Gaara.

“I was hurting after our breakup. I thought that in order to get over you, I should move onto someone and Shira was there.” Lee said, guilt eating at his heart as he continued on. Gaara raised a non-existent brow at the man next to him.

“Gaara…” He started to say, fighting to find the words to say. “I tried to apologize after the fight, I called you a million times. If you missed me so much, why didn’t you answer them then?” Gaara ran a hand through his hair, shuffling his feet around in the dirt.

“I was being blackmailed by Hakuto’s mother into dating her. I didn’t think it would be fair to you to try and mend things while I was unable to get out of it.” Gaara explained, reaching for Lee again. “But I’ve taken care of it and now we can be together again.”

Lee sighed heavily, staring at Gaara with hurt in his eyes. He dodged the touch and walked to sit down on the bench. Gaara followed suit and followed Lee’s eyes as he stared off into the distance.

“Gaara,” Lee asked softly as he turned to the red head. His heart skipped a beat as they met the beautiful teal eyes he’d fallen so deeply in love with. “Do you know why we fought before? Why I was upset?” Gaara looked down at his feet, replaying that night in his mind like he had for the last nine months.

“Because I didn’t trust you with things going on in my life.” Gaara answered, leaning forward to lay his hands on his knees. “I pushed you away instead of talking to you and hiding the way I feel for you like it was something to be ashamed of.” Lee shook his head, staring at his hands in his lap.

“Gaara, I love you but I cannot keep doing this.” Lee said, voice hard and brimming with barely controlled anger. “I cannot keep giving you every part of myself just to have you push me away when something difficult happens.”

Gaara nodded, his heart sinking with the weight of Lee’s words. Lee sighed, shaking his head as he looked off into the distance.

“You cannot expect me to just take your word on this, not this time.” Lee stated, words heavy with hurt. “You have pushed me away so many times before, not trusted me to love you no matter what so many times before. I love you but there is only so much forgiveness I can give.”

He turned to Gaara, eyes meeting his fiercely. The familiar spark of determination was just under the depths of Lee’s anger. He needed more than just apologies this time.

Gaara met Lee’s gaze steadily and pulled out a small newspaper. He had picked up the latest print on his way out of Suna, one that would reveal just how much he was willing to give to show Lee how serious he was. He just hoped it would be enough.

Lee blinked as Gaara put the paper in his lap. Round eyes widened as he read the article at the head of the paper.

**_NO SABAKU HEIR HIDES SECRET GAY LIFESTYLE: relationship with It Girl Hōki Hakuto a Hoax!_ **

The article featured a picture, the one that had caused their fight directly on the first page. As Lee read through the article, stopping ever so often to sound out words and decipher the mixed up letters, he read that Gaara had submitted the picture himself. The red head was coming out and was planning a press conference in Konoha where he would answer any and all questions.

Lee looked up at Gaara, who was patiently waiting for Lee to finish reading. Gaara reached a hand to lay it on Lee’s own. Lee looked up, disbelief still clouding his eyes.

“I had Shikamaru send the media the picture as well as a request for a press conference…” Gaara said softly, eyes begging as they searched Lee’s for some indicator that he was forgiven. “I’d like for you to come with me as my boyfriend, just like we used to.”

Lee blinked, unable to process what he had just heard. Gaara had come out publically, to his company and to the world just so he wouldn’t have a reason to hide anymore. Just so he could be with Lee.

“Lee, I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness.” He began, heart rate increasing with the sudden skin to skin contact with Lee. “I hurt you and I can’t ever take it back but I’ve missed you so much it hurt, I couldn’t get you out of my mind, and I couldn’t even be with Hakuto in the same room without wishing it was you I was with. I was only trying to protect you from more heartache because…Because…” Gaara took a deep breath and took Lee’s face in his hands.

Brown eyes met teal and Lee felt his breath hitch at Gaara’s closeness. The red head smiled gently at Lee, eyes filled with emotions that swirled in them like an ocean.

“I love you Lee,” Gaara said softly, smiling gently at Lee. “I never told you before but I do, I love you so much it scares me more than anything in the world. But being apart hurts me so much more than that fear…I never want to be without you, Lee.”

Lee shook his head, tears gathering in his eyes as the lump in his throat grew. He had longed to hear those words from Gaara for so long. Now here the red head was, saying the words Lee had wanted to hear, was ready to proclaim to the world that love…

But Lee didn’t deserve them, he had betrayed Gaara’s feelings.

He bit his lip again as he felt tears prick at his eyes. His heart ached in his chest as he stood, trying to separate himself from Gaara’s distracting touch. Lee stood awkwardly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He took a shaky breath. He needed to tell Gaara, even if it pushed him away.

“I do not deserve your love Gaara.” Lee whispered, hanging his head. “I-I was hurting and I…I slept with Shira and I hated every second of it.” Gaara blinked at him, surprised. The hurt hummed in his chest.

Gaara had just sacrificed his reputation to earn Lee’s trust back. That was something precious that could never be regained and here he stood, disloyal and used.

“I-I wanted to be with you but I thought I needed to give myself to someone else because I thought…I thought you didn’t want me anymore.” Lee struggled to say through the raw guilt in his heart. “You just sacrificed everything to regain my trust and I just…” Lee trailed off as his shoulders slumped in defeat, rubbing his left arm.

Gaara stood up, walking to stand in front of Lee looked down at Lee’s left arm, reaching for it. Lee blinked as Gaara gently lifted the sleeve to his hoodie, revealing the scars that Lee bore from his teenage years. Gaara traced the letters with fingers for a moment.

The word “Fag’ was burned clearly into the skin, once red and angry had now settled into pink scars that could catch the eye of anyone who saw them. Lee often wore bandages to cover them, hating the word that he had been branded with but not the reason why he had them. It seemed so long ago when Lee had received the branding by bullies who had deemed their relationship unworthy and had taken it out on Lee.

Gaara pulled the scarred arm to him, kissing them gently. Lee’s breath hitched as Gaara looked up at him again.

 “No Lee, I'm the one who doesn't deserve you. I never have.” Gaara said, reaching a hand up to cup Lee’s cheek. “I don’t care if you slept with Shira or anyone else. I love you and I want to be with you. If I can’t be your first, then be mine. I had to live without you for nine months and I refuse to do it for any longer.”

Lee placed his hand over Gaara’s, leaning into it as he closed his eyes. Gaara’s eyes softened at the man he loved, stroking his cheek.

“I forgive you if that’s what you need to hear in order to have you back at my side.” Gaara said softly, hoping to reassure Lee’s fears. “You forgave me when I dislocated your arm and almost ended your martial arts career, you forgave me whenever I’ve had my episodes and you think I won’t want you because you’re not a virgin anymore? Do you hear how silly that sounds?”

Lee bit his lip at Gaara’s words, the tenderness in the touches, and the gentleness of Gaara’s voice. Gaara still wanted him, still wanted to be with him despite the fact he had been disloyal. Thinking on it more clearly, Gaara was right. How could he have been so worried about Gaara wanting him just because he had slept with someone?

 “I want you and all these months apart only made me more certain that you are the only one for me. I love you with all I am.” Lee sniffed, opening his eyes to give Gaara a watery smile. Gaara was smiling at him and Lee pulled Gaara into his arms.

“I love you too Gaara.” Lee whispered, eyes soft and full of emotion as the happiness he felt unraveled the ache in his heart and replaced it with the warmth he had missed so much. Gaara wrapped his arms around Lee, taking in the scent of the man he loved.

God, he had missed this so much.

Gaara pressed his lips to Lee’s in a gentle kiss, relishing in the soft feeling of Lee’s lips on his own. Lee tangled his fingers in Gaara’s hair as he pulled him closer with one hand around his waist.

Gaara pulled away and smiled as Lee pressed a kiss to his forehead before taking Gaara’s hand in his own. Gaara returned the bright grin with his own half smile as they walked to Lee’s car.

For the first time in a long time, Gaara felt warm again.

* * *

 

 

Gaara took Lee to his hotel near the edge of the city. Neither of them wanted to be away from each other after being apart for so long. Naruto left a note on Lee’s car with the information for Gaara’s room as well as what he would tell Gai and Kakashi when he got home.

Lee was grateful that Naruto was so understanding of things like this. He couldn’t ask for a better friend.

Lee followed Gaara into the room, smiling as he spotted his familiar green duffel bag in the corner of the single bed room. Naruto had brought his things for him and despite the fact the room only had one bed, Lee was grateful for a change of clothes.

He opened the bag for a shirt, spying a brown paper bag with a small note on the front. Lee picked it up, scanning the note and raising a brow when he recognized Naruto’s handwriting.

**_Picked these up for you guys just in case. Try not to have too much fun. - Naruto_ **

Lee peeked inside the bag, face turning bright red as he took note of the contents. The bag was filled with condoms, gloves, and varying types of lube. Lee shoved the bag back into his duffel, hoping that Gaara wouldn’t notice. He turned to look at the man.

Lee watched Gaara for a moment as the man walked over to the dresser, taking off his watch and running a hand over his face. Gaara always looked so handsome no matter what he did. Gaara looked up at Lee, cheeks turning pink when he noticed Lee’s eyes on him.

Lee turned away, blushing as he tried to regain his self-control. His heart was humming with the need to be close to Gaara but Lee was nervous. After so long apart, he wasn’t sure what he should and shouldn’t do.

Lee sighed, pulling his shirt up to his nose. He wrinkled it at the smell. He really should have changed before he went to see Shira. He pulled the shirt off, reaching over to his duffel bag to grab a new one when he felt soft hands on his back.

Lee turned slightly, watching Gaara as he trailed his fingers over the still dark love bites that decorated his back and shoulders. Lee bit his lip as Gaara scanned his body with sad eyes.

“Did he do this?” Gaara asked as he ran his hand up Lee’s chest. Lee nodded as Gaara looked up at him as he wrapped arms around Lee’s waist. Lee wrapped one arm around Gaara’s waist, bringing up the other to run his fingers through Gaara’s soft hair.

“Yes.” Lee replied simply as Gaara sighed. Lee smiled and leaned forward to kiss his boyfriend’s forehead, stepping away from him and leading Gaara back towards the bed.

“Lay with me Gaara, I want to hold you.” Lee asked as he laid on the bed. A soft smile graced Gaara’s lips as he stepped onto the bed, reassuring Lee’s anxieties. Lee pulled him towards his body. Gaara sighed as he settled into Lee’s arms, inhaling the scent of Lee.

Lee looked down at him, leaning forward to press his lips to Gaara’s. Gaara’s arms wrapped around Lee’s shoulders as Lee’s hands wrapped around his waist. Gaara closed his eyes as Lee licked along the seam of his lips.

Gaara smiled as he opened his mouth to allow Lee access. Lee’s hands wandered up his shirt, pulling his lips away for a moment to press them along Gaara’s jaw and neck. Gaara’s breath hitched as Lee’s rough hands traveled up his shirt, gently massaging the soft skin.

God he had missed this, the scent of Lee all around and his arms around him. His whole body relaxed against Lee’s touches and the warmth pooled in his belly. Gaara murmured as Lee pressed his lips to the junction of his shoulder, inhaling the soft scent.

Gaara’s hands wandered their own path down Lee’s body, worshiping the skin of Lee’s bare chest. He brushed the hardness of Lee’s arousal, making the man gasp. Lee looked up at him, eyes questioning. Gaara flushed and leaned forward, kissing Lee’s neck and sucking softly on one of the previous bites as he pawed at Lee’s jeans.

“G-Gaara…” Lee gasped, whimpering as Gaara’s hands undid the button of his jeans. Gaara quickly moved his hand down Lee’s hip bones, taking Lee’s cock in his hands. He kissed over the dark love bites, darkening them with his own as he reclaimed his lover’s body for himself.

Lee’s moaned as Gaara’s lips moved over his body, his soft hands awkwardly touching his arousal. Gaara moved further down his body. Lee whimpered in surprise as Gaara wandered lower.

“Gaara, what are you…” Lee started to ask when Gaara’s hand wrapped around the base of Lee’s shaft. Lee gasped at the pressure as Gaara looked up at him, staring at him with wide teal eyes. Lee’s heart rate picked up as Gaara leaned forward, giving Lee’s head a soft lick.

“Gaara…when I said I just wanted to hold you, I meant only that.” Lee whimpered as Gaara pumped his hand, capping his mouth over the head of Lee’s cock and sucking. “I-I did not mean we had to do anything…I do not expect you to want to…” Gaara looked up at Lee, smirking in a way that made Lee’s cock twitch in Gaara’s hand.

“I want to do this Lee, I want to make you feel good.” Gaara said, pumping his hand shallowly. “Unless you want me to stop?” Lee shook his head as he threaded his fingers through Gaara’s hair as he sat up slightly, propping himself up on his arm.

“No Gaara, please don’t stop.” Lee begged softly, earning a happy grin from Gaara as the man put his head back down. Gaara looked up at Lee, teal eyes challenging Lee as his lips capped over Lee’s cock.

Gaara licked the slit of Lee’s cock, sucking a little harder as he pumped his hand and bobbed his head slightly. Lee gasped, whining as Gaara increased his speed.

“W-when did you learn this Gaara?” Lee moaned as he thrust shallowly into Gaara’s mouth. Gaara hummed as he took a little more of Lee into his mouth, heart skipping when Lee moaned his name in response. Gaara pulled away slightly, rolling his tongue around the head before answering.

“You forget that I have read Jiraiya’s books…” Gaara said, pumping his hand and capping his mouth over Lee’s cock for a particularly hard suck.

“Gaara!” Lee cried out, pleasure shivering up his spine as Gaara threw all his focus into making Lee feel good. He pushed his tongue into the slit, pulled his hand away to pull as much of Lee’s length into his mouth as he could manage without choking. Gaara sucked, bobbing his head when Lee stopped him. Gaara released Lee and looked up at him.

“If you keep that up, I won’t last much longer.” Lee panted pulling Gaara up to him for another kiss. Gaara let his tongue tangle with Lee’s as the man pulled his shirt over his head and momentarily broke the kiss while Lee kicked his pants the rest of the way off.

Lee’s hand glided down Gaara’s body, moving towards the pants his boyfriend wore. Lee moved the pants down, letting Gaara’s cock free from its clothed confines as he tossed the pants aside. Lee’s eyes looked over Gaara’s completely naked form and his breath hitched at how beautiful his boyfriend was.

Soft pale skin almost glowed in the darkness of the room, not a single scar to mar the perfection before him. Lee looked down into those beautiful teal eyes he loved so much with a softness in his own. Those eyes had been the first thing he had ever noticed about Gaara, the first thing that drew him to the once lonely teenager. He could never fail to get lost in them.

Lee cupped Gaara’s face in his hands, pulling him into another kiss. Gaara murmured as he settled into the gentle kiss. Lee’s hands wandered down his body as if Lee were trying to memorize ever rise and fall of him and commit it to his memory.

Lee’s hands ran up Gaara’s side, making the younger man gasp at the sensations. Lee’s hand ran over Gaara’s chest, watching the red head’s face carefully as he ran a rough thumb over a dusky nipple. Gaara gasped again, biting his lips as calloused fingers brushed his nipples again.

Lee leaned forward, kissing along Gaara’s neck. He sucked red marks along Gaara’s collarbone, trying to be careful to leave them where no one would notice them. Gaara whimpered as Lee made his way down to his chest and placed a tentative lick over his already raised nipple.

“L-Lee.” Gaara moaned as Lee’s free hand wrapped around his cock, stroking him to full hardness as he nipped at his sensitive skin. Gaara whimpered as Lee scraped his teeth over his nipple, grimacing at the pain. He didn’t like that.

Lee looked up, expression quizzical as Gaara unconsciously pushed him away. The red head shook his head.

“That hurt.” Gaara said simply and Lee nodded, feeling guilty as he moved away from that part of Gaara’s body.

“I am sorry, I will be gentler.” Lee said apologetically as he kissed Gaara’s forehead, keeping the rhythm of his strokes on Gaara’s cock for a few moments before pulling away to walk over to his duffel bag. Gaara raised a non-existent brow as Lee held up a small brown bag with a wide grin.

“Naruto left us a small gift just in case.” Lee joked as he sat the bag down on the night stand. He opened the bag and pulled out the contents. Gaara’s eyes widened as Lee set down three lube bottles, gloves and condoms.

Lee turned to Gaara, looking down at him with a soft, sad smile. Gaara knew what he was thinking about without Lee saying it but he didn’t say anything. He would help Lee with the guilt as best he could.

“H-how did you want to do this?” Lee asked nervously as he shifted his weight around. “I can be in you or you can be in me. I didn’t particularly like being bottom but the stretching can be a little uncomfortable…” Gaara rose from his spot on the bed, pulling Lee into a silencing kiss.

“I want you inside of me.” Gaara said, sensing that Lee had not enjoyed his first time. He would ask later but for now, he wanted Lee to be comfortable for their first time together. Lee smiled again as he nodded.

“As you wish, my love.” Lee said as he pulled on some gloves, grabbing the bottle that read “self-heating, silicone anal lube” in big orange letters. Lee turned to Gaara with a heated look in his eyes.

“Get on your back, I need to stretch you with my fingers first so I do not hurt you.” Lee said as Gaara obeyed, laying down on his back and letting Lee settle between them.

Lee’s breathe hitched as Gaara lay spread out before him. He bit his lip as he poured the lube onto his gloved fingers, bringing them down to circle the hard ring of muscle. Gaara moaned as the lube heated, a strange sensation he wasn’t sure he liked yet.

“I am going to put one finger in Gaara.” Lee announced, meeting Gaara’s eyes nervously. Gaara nodded as he took a deep breath and tried to relax his muscles. Lee’s eyes never left Gaara’s face as he guided his finger in and let the muscles pull it inside.

Gaara groaned, face flushing as Lee moved his finger into him slowly and let Gaara adjust. Gaara found the feeling weird, just riding on the cusp of being painful and feeling pleasurable. He looked up at Lee.

“Y-you can keep going.” He said, wanting to do this quickly. Lee nodded his head, letting Gaara’s muscles pull his finger in and out slightly so he could pour more lube onto his fingers. He inserted a second one carefully.

This time, Gaara could feel a small burn from the muscles and his breath hitched as he tried to breathe. Lee went slowly, stilling his fingers inside of Gaara as he took Gaara’s cock into his hand. The gentle pumping distracted Gaara as his muscles grew used to the intrusion.

“Let me know if anything I do gets to be too much.” Lee said, his voice stern as he added. “We cannot move too quickly or I could tear something. The last thing I want to do is hurt you Gaara.” Gaara nodded as Lee gently pulled his fingers out and let them be pulled back in.

The muscles continued to burn slightly as Lee continued to stroke Gaara’s cock with one hand as he fingered his ass with the other. Gaara wrinkled his brow when Lee moved his fingers around, as if he was searching for something.

“Lee, what are you-?” Gaara started to ask when suddenly Lee curled his fingers on a spot inside of him. A jolt of pleasure shot up Gaara’s spine, making him cry out and the heat pool in his belly. He looked up at Lee, panting.

“Found it.” The bushy browed man smirked, pulling his fingers out a little more to add more lube before guiding them back in. “That’s your prostate Gaara, does that feel good when I touch it?” Gaara whimpered as Lee touched him again, fondling that same spot and making Gaara buck against his hand.

“Oh god, yes Lee!” Gaara cried out, wanting more as his cock began to feel painfully hard. But Lee shook his head, smirking and continued to move slowly. Lee began pumping his fingers, scissoring them occasionally until Gaara growled underneath him.

“Fuck Lee, hurry up!” He snapped and Lee raised a brow. Lee chuckled, adding more lube as he inserted a third finger. Gaara gasped as his muscles stretched further, burning again with the extra appendage.

“I know you want me to hurry Gaara,” Lee said as he stilled his fingers again to allow Gaara time to adjust. “I am a lot bigger than three fingers and I do not want to hurt you.” Gaara nodded as Lee pressed against his prostate again, making him moan in pleasure again as it built. As the pain faded, Gaara pushed back against Lee’s hand as he fanned his fingers inside of him.

Lee bit his lip, reaching for a condom as his eyes met Gaara’s. Gaara murmured as Lee pulled his fingers from him, removing his gloves and tossing them to the side. Lee opened the condom with his teeth, face flushing as he pulled it onto his hard cock. He reached for the lube, coating himself in it before moving behind Gaara and settling the red head on his side. He had read that this position was the most comfortable for the very first time. Lee looked down at Gaara as he locked eyes with him.

His breath caught as he looked down at the man he loved, so open and vulnerable beneath him. Gaara squirmed as Lee wrapped an arm around him, his arousal bobbing as he panted up at Lee. Lee laid himself over Gaara, pressing the head against the opening. Lee locked eyes with Gaara.

“Are you sure about this Gaara?” Lee asked, giving his boyfriend a way out if he felt uncomfortable. “I will not mind if you change your mind.” Gaara looked up at Lee, considering the nervous flutter in his gut as Lee pressed against him. He wanted, no needed to have Lee in him.

“No, please don’t stop Lee.” Gaara begged as he bucked up, his arousal feeling almost painful now. “I want you inside of me, only you.” Lee nodded, his heart skipping a beat in his chest as he pressed against Gaara’s opening.

“Try to relax Gaara, I will go slow and let you pull me in.” Lee explained, heated and hungry eyes not leaving Gaara’s face. “You may feel a little discomfort but if it hurts too much, let me know and I will stop.” Gaara nodded, readying himself as Lee pushed the head of his cock into the ring of muscles.

Gaara groaned as the head of Lee’s cock pushed into him, stretching him as the muscles burned. It felt uncomfortable but it didn’t hurt as Lee stilled for a moment, looking down at Gaara.

“Y-you can keep going, it doesn’t hurt.” Gaara panted as Lee nodded, pressing a kiss to his forehead as he let the muscles pull him in further. Gaara bit his lip as he felt himself stretch, gasping as Lee was pulled in half way. His hand went up to Lee’s chest and Lee froze.

“Did I hurt you?” Lee asked, panicking slightly as he looked down at Gaara, searching his face for pain. Gaara chuckled, shaking his head as he tried to control his breathing and allow himself to relax.

“N-no, but I think I need you to stay still for a moment.” Gaara reassured, letting his body relax as the muscles started to loosen. Lee stood stock still, the concern not leaving his face until Gaara felt the slight pain and burn ebb away. He nodded up at Lee.

“You can move again.” Gaara said as Lee let himself slid in until he was fully seated inside of him. Lee kissed Gaara’s neck and shoulders, distracting him from the slight burn of his muscles that still remained. Lee’s breath hitched, whimpering at the tightness of Gaara all around him.

Lee moaned as he tried to remain still, focusing himself on anything but the tight heat that threatened to overwhelm him. As he closed his eyes, Lee could feel Gaara’s heartbeat from inside of him as it pulsed around his cock. It felt amazing as his heart swelled with affection.

“I can feel your heart beating Gaara.” Lee whispered as his hands massaged gentle circles on Gaara’s hip bones. “It feel so amazing…” Gaara whimpered as he took a deep breath. The pain and burn had long since dissipated and Gaara pulled himself off of Lee’s cock a little before moving back again to test what he could do.

Lee gasped as Gaara moaned, his hand moving to Lee’s hips. He was ready for Lee to move.

“Go slow.” Gaara asked as Lee began to pull out almost painfully slow. Gaara gasped as Lee moved back into him, brushing his prostate as he did. Lee was gentle as he moved in and out of his lover, kissing along his shoulders.

Gaara could feel how tense Lee was as he moved, trying so desperately not to hurt him. Gaara pushed back onto Lee, wrapping his arm around Lee’s neck. Lee was nervous, his whole body showing it. Gaara turned his head slightly, tangling his fingers in Lee’s hair.

“You can go a bit faster, it doesn’t hurt.” Gaara said as Lee murmured into his shoulder. The thrusts picked up pace, making Gaara moan in pleasure. Lee’s cock felt amazing now that the pain had ebbed. Gaara could feel the strong muscles that held him as Lee groaned at the tightness around him. Lee’s heart was pounding as his chest pressed against his back, setting the rhythm of his thrusts. Gaara gasped as Lee found his prostate easily with just a roll of his hips.  

“Lee, right there!” Gaara cried as he began to lose himself in the sensation of Lee moving inside of him. With each thrust, another jolt of pleasure shot up his spine and pooled the heat in his belly. Lee felt the nervousness that was curling in his gut unravel as he closed his eyes.

Soon, Lee’s own body relaxed as he began to focus on the tightness all around him. It felt good to be moving inside of Gaara, losing himself in the thrusts and the noises his boyfriend was making as his tight ass wrapped his cock in warmth. Lee grunted as he felt his end approaching, gathering in the base of his spine as the slap of flesh hitting flesh filled the room.

“G-Gaara, you are so tight.” Lee gasped as Gaara turned his head, pressing his lips to Lee’s as his arm wrapped around his head. “It feels amazing…” Lee pulled out of Gaara for a moment, flipping the man around onto his back before he slid back in easily.

Gaara’s breath hitched as he looked directly up at Lee, watching his muscles ripple as he leaned over Gaara. Lee had always been well-muscled but watching the muscles move as Lee pounded into him made Gaara feel hot. Gaara scraped his nails down Lee’s chest, feeling the hard abs beneath his fingers as Lee hissed. Lee met his eyes, heat and lust swirling in them as Lee moved forward.

Gaara felt Lee’s lips crash against his own, tongue tangling with his lovers as Lee increased the speed of his thrusts. He was practically rutting against Gaara now. Gaara looked up into Lee’s eyes, crying out as Lee loomed over him. Lee’s brown eyes were heated with lust and fire as he rolled his hips.

Gaara felt Lee’s arm wrap around his waist, lifting him slightly as Gaara instinctually wrapped his legs around Lee’s waist and arched his back. Gaara cried Lee’s name as Lee thrust into him, making the bed squeak beneath them.

Gaara was a mess of pleasure as each thrust hit his prostate head on. Gaara’s cock was almost rock hard, the arousal starting to feel painful as he whined with every movement. Lee smirked as he looked down, sweat gathering on his forehead as he began to lick and suck at Gaara’s throat.

“Please Lee…” Gaara begged, his voice surprising him with how desperate it sounded. “I need you to touch me, please touch me.” Lee’s hand snaked between their bodies, wrapping around Gaara’s length. The red head whimpered as Lee began stroking the sensitive length.

“Do you like the way this feels?” Lee panted, hot breath on Gaara’s ear as he continued his assault on Gaara’s prostate. “God Gaara, you feel so amazing and tight.” Gaara moaned, not bothering to contain his voice as his end began to build.

“L-Lee, I can feel...” Gaara struggled to say as Lee’s rough hand stroked over his cock, his thrusting becoming sporadic. “I’m so close Lee, please don’t stop!” Lee buried his face in Gaara’s shoulder, whispering Gaara’s name in a quiet mantra as Gaara’s arms wrapped around his shoulders. Lee lifted his head, growling in Gaara’s ear.

“Come for me Gaara.” Lee ordered softly, voice rough as it sent Gaara over the edge. Gaara came hard, seed spurting up and splashing onto their stomach. Gaara panted, looking up at Lee as the man finished.

Lee was panting, hair falling into his eyes as he continued his thrusts. Gaara found his heart swelling with affection as Lee looked down at him, eyes filled with love as he leaned over Gaara. The thrusts were slower now, gentler and more sensual than before.

This wasn’t just sex for release, this was Lee communicating his love through their bodies. Lee let out a small whimper as Gaara wrapped his arms around Lee, pressing their foreheads together as Lee continued to thrust into him.

“Gaara…s-so close, I cannot…” Lee struggled through his haze of pleasure as Gaara lifted one hand to cup his cheek.

 “I love you.” Gaara whispered as Lee stiffened, his end washing over him suddenly as he stilled his thrusts.

“Gaara!” Lee roared, his eyes locked on Gaara’s. Gaara felt his heart beat in his chest as Lee’s cock pulsed inside him, filling the condom. Gaara whimpered as he held Lee close, kissing him on the lips again as they stayed connected for a moment longer.

But soon, Lee’s arms began to shake and almost gave out as he pulled out of Gaara. Lee rolled off of him, collapsing next to Gaara on the bed as they laid panting. The sweat cooled on his body when Gaara finally found himself turning to stare at Lee.

Lee’s chest rose and fell as his body calmed down, his body relaxed and covered in sweat. Gaara smiled, reaching out to touch Lee’s arm. Part of him thought this was a dream, a cruel one that he would wake up from in his bed in Suna.

His hand touched Lee’s arm, his heart aching slightly as Lee turned to him. Lee’s scars felt soft under his hands as Gaara let them wander down Lee’s arm. He pushed closer to Lee, fingers grazing over the strong chest he had been admiring.

Lee was here, Lee was his and no one could tear them apart again.

Lee’s eyes softened as he turned onto his side to meet Gaara’s eyes, seeing the fear and relief in them. He knew exactly what Gaara was feeling as he moved toward him. Lee wrapped his arms around Gaara’s waist, pulling him close as Gaara settled his head under Lee’s chin.

Gaara inhaled the familiar scent again as Lee pressed his lips to his head. Gaara buried his face in the junction of Lee’s shoulder, letting his whole body relax against his boyfriend’s.

I love you so much Lee.” Gaara whispered into his lover’s shoulder. Lee sighed contentedly, watching Gaara with love filled eyes as he laid his head against the pillows. His eyes wandered over Gaara, taking in the beauty before him.

“I love you too Gaara.” Lee whispered as Gaara felt his eyes becoming heavy with the need for sleep. His body was already starting to feel sore as Lee stroked his back, whispering sweet nothings in his ear. His heart felt warm inside his chest as Gaara closed his eyes slowly with his ear pressed against Lee’s chest.

The last thing he heard before he drifted off, was the soft rhythm of Lee’s heartbeat.

 


End file.
